Jacks Abbey Pumpkin Crop Lager

Jack's Abbey Pumpkin Crop Lager - Mom and Pop's Harvest Series (2012)
Brewed and Bottled by Jack's Abbey Brewing, in Framingham, MA. USA.
Autumn Seasonal  (First Year Beer)
16.9 fl. oz. / $2.99 USD / 5.5% ABV

About: "The 2012 harvest on our Mom & Pop’s farm was fruitful and this brew uses 100 fresh pumpkins and 40 organic squash. We prepared, cooked, and pureed all the gourds with the help of our friends at Carrie Anne’s Modern Diner. A blend of autumn spices adds to the intense pumpkin flavors. Uses locally grown Triticale from MA."

Thoughts: Pumpkin Crop Lager poured a supremely hazy and dark burnt amber / blood orange color with a massive slightly raspberry colored head. Hey, I write what I see. That doesn't mean I don't "see things."

The scent is pretty outstanding for something described as a "lager". There's a heavy malt flow which is sweet and savory when mixed with those pumpkins, and a ton of spice that doesn't smell over-spiced. If you know what I mean? It's a bit earthy with a dominating nutmeg aspect. Nicely done, I'd say.

First gulp was embedded with a spicy sweetness. It's rich and savory. There's a quick explosion blast. It leaves a bit of a sugar cookie type aftertaste. There's a hint of ginger, and it's toasty like bread so it gives off this gingerbread man type vibe. It's really flavorful - not extreme - but, it's good. Once swallowed, the tastes pretty much all go away. It tastes good though.

Mouth feel is smooth as all hell. And, just a little sticky.

I got "No Problemo" (no hay problema?) with this one. It's mild, yet flavorful, tastes good and it's not offensive. So why not. Note: I reviewed this about three weeks to a month before I did the Sam Adams Gingerbread Stout by the way... only this one I had written while watching "Tale of a Vampire" so I didn't post it until now.  So the whole "gingerbread" thing was not more than subconscious.

5 Delightfully Twisted Moments in Demons 2 (1986)

As far as I'm concerned, the sequel (and arguable remake) of the 1985 film Demons is a massively underrated gem. Sure, it's roughed up, dusty and has a chip in it... but it's still money, baby! As long as I've been into checking out horror film reviews, I noticed that this movie has been unnecessarily shit upon from day one. And for what I ask? Look, it's gotta be real fuckin' hard to follow up the original film. Demons is a classic masterpiece of celluloid splatter! How do you top the original? The answer is, you don't. Demons 2 shouldn't be faulted for being "so incredibly sub par compared to the original", but rather cherished, for giving us more of what we all wanted after the first film. So let's get this party started... with a few scenes that intrigue me:

1. The Intro

Boisterous music hits during the opening credits of Demons 2, and soon thereafter, a mysterious narrator speaks the following words: "A terrifying centuries old prediction, foretold the spawning of demons on earth. That prediction came true when spectators in a movie theater, were transformed into bloodthirsty fanged creatures and spread death and contagion. Days of terror that convinced the world that Demons can exist."

After the creepy voice-over intro (which was set in pure darkness), the film opens up with a shot of a gleaming knife. Some red grue drips onto it, then a table-side seemingly covered in blood, dripping more and more onto this knife. A doorway slowly creeks as it sways back and forth, its shadows moving across the floor. A large man with a limp comes through the door with red shit all over his apron. He's wiping the grime off of his hands. Who is this guy and what nubile young flesh did he just dismember?! As he cleans off the knife, the camera pans up to a tipped jar of strawberry puree and then over to a table full of pastries and cakes. He then writes 'Happy Birthday Sally!' on one of them.

It's a real mindfuck of an opening sequence, and one totally unexpected. It's also very humorous, especially when you think about it for a while... or happen to be on mind-altering substances. Just one of the many examples of Dario and Lamberto fucking with the viewer in this movie. And believe me, there are many more to come in Demons 2. In fact, I could imagine the both of them giggling like naughty schoolchildren while in the back of the cinemas when this first came out, watching the audience squirm at the not-so-subtle nuances presented within.

2. The TV Documentary

You gotta love the whole movie within a movie angle... especially back when it wasn't so popular and overdone. Everybody in a high tech, high rise building and their dog and/or prostitute is watching this television program about the "Coming of the Demons". We get these really cool roaming shots throughout the building of our potential victims while they all stare blankly at the glowing screen. There's a family with their cute daughter, a kid by himself, an alcoholic lady drinking rum and eating ice cream with her furry dog, an incredibly hot pregnant chick and her irresistibly handsome man, a dirty prostitute and her john who insists they "do it with the TV on", oh, and a girl at her birthday party who absolutely hates her hair and dress.

You gotta love the whole retelling of a movie within a retelling of a movie angle too... it's like poetry, it just sort of rhymes. We've got different, yet familiar looking teenagers here, all with very familiar voices, and they're out looking for fallout items from the Demons plague. They hop over a barbed wire-laden stone gate into the "forbidden zone" to gather up their bounty. It's a pretty grimy area, and as they roam through it searching for lizards for proof of the Demons, we get more dread filled voice-over of impending doom: "The Demons rampaged through the streets. Fear and Death were the order of the day. The Fuck? Then, man learned to fight back and the forces of evil, were defeated. Today that seemingly endless moment of horror is an almost forgotten nightmare. But the questions are still there: Can it happen again? Will we be ready next time? What's being done to prevent it? Is a wall enough to keep an inhuman threat at bay!?"

Apparently a wall isn't enough to keep these subhuman threats "at bay", as both the psychical (and soon, the metaphysical) wall in the film has been obstructed. During their trespassing activities of stupidity, we are treated to such gems of dialogue as: "What happened to those on the other side?" "What happened?! The Demons got 'em and turned 'em into more Demons!" and "Ah, it's nothing... just a scratch!" - A classic line! One of my favorite moments in particular is when the group of teens find a long, sharp fingernail of a Demon in the mud. They all get super excited about it and put it in a glad bag. While dumb girl #1 takes photos, the nerdier of the two guys proclaims: "Our first trophy!". Then the other dude lays down a truly mind-blowing comment with: "You know I read somewhere, they spread their contagion... through their fingernails!" Well f'n gee-whiz dumb fucks! Maybe you shouldn't be touching that shit then. Stupid idiots. One of the girls of course cuts herself and while posing for a photo, lets her blood drip into the dormant Demon's mouth. Go figure. 

3. Little Boy Answers the Phone

Number 3 and 5 in this list are two more instances of simply executed scenes that help intensify the viewers sense of unease. As the film goes between the TV program within a movie and the real life people at home watching it, a low boiling sense of dread begins to build. The stupid teenagers are getting closer to discovering Demonic activity, and the viewers are now really glued to the tube. Inside one apartment, a young boy is laying on the floor watching the scary show in awe, when suddenly the telephone rings. He gets up to answer it, and then drops a bombshell of absolute hilarity!:

"Hello. No daddy isn't... home. Neither's mommy. I'm alone! Yes, goodbye."

This really is a film that deserves a drunken midnight theater audience track. Admittedly, I was utterly toasted the first time I ever saw this, so anytime one of the characters said something so over-the-top stupid I felt a tingling through my body. But this one left me not only flabbergasted, but incredibly giddy as well. My eyes widened, and I slowly cracked the biggest smile ever, as what I had just seen, I never imagined could ever be done... and with such finesse. From the low droning music, the weird shit going, all of the teasing, and then this? A fucked up little scene like this just screams the fact that Bad Shit is Going to Happen! You bet your ass.

4. Demons 3-D?

"A Demon! Hey, that's crazy!", Sally says with a little bit of bewildered wonderment. After throwing multiple fits at her birthday party, she's been distracted and has become completely immersed in this gruesome program about the supposedly true events detailing the Demons' uprising. "Blood... nurtures the dormant seed of Evil! How can the Demons be stopped? Is another apacoalypical prediction about to come true? The winds of death will sweep across the world, and whole continents will be cast adrift in an ocean of blood." Just as these words are spoken by the whimsically grim narrator, the first Demon from the television show stares a hole into the viewers soul. A low droned bass line hits, sending chills down the spine of anyone watching this alone in the dark.

As the demon slowly approaches the screen, we see his view of Sally through the television... her face, glimmering in the blinking light. He then starts pushing his face through the screen, into her world, and terror ensues. When the television goes to static, Sally dismisses it as her own imagination. Like a few of the other characters in this movie however, there's something inside of her now. But what happened to this television Demon? Was his split-second rotting flesh and blood incarnation simply imagined? Do the Demons actually require physical contact to spread their "disease"? Or are poor and unfortunate lost souls just so easy to succumb to these creature's horrendous nature and influence?

5. Sally Blows Out Her Candles

Or rather, fails to do so! As Sally's blood is quickly becoming infected from that Television Demon's possession and her body begins to boil, she slowly makes her way to her birthday cake while her guests sing for her. She's writhing in pain, but trying not to let it show as she bends down to blow out her candles. The veins in her arm are protruding and she looks as if she's trying not to drop her intestinal track out her ass. Everyone's oblivious. She finally musters up enough breath to blow out her candles, but alas, one of the candles is still left lit after her unworthy blow. So sad.

I guess her private wish isn't going to come true. What horrible luck! This small part of the much more elaborate scene is a really nice touch, and it's the little things like this that really make Demons 2 such a fun experience. These are some of the cool details written into the film, which range from ironic to amusing, downright silly to diabolical. Oh and speaking of horrible luck, there will be more to come on my coverage of this not-so-fan-favorite flick, including more of the awesomeness most viewers either overlook or dismiss. Keep your eyes peeled!

Samuel Adams Merry Mischief

Merry Fake-O-Ween!1 That's right.

What?! Stone Cold ET, wants to celebrate Halloween... three days late... and drink himself, a couple Christmas beers... and that's the bottmline!!1 What!?? I said, Halloween... has come a little late, and is Nuts to Butts with this here years Christmas Season! What?!... Gimme a Hell Yeah!, if you like your pumpkins... and your mistletoe... inter-mingling, while you drink beers, kissin' each other, and plumpin up, while you whoop your bitches ass! Wait, what?!

So the town I'm currently residing in is celebrating Halloween today. I guess it's "for the kids" because the 31'st didn't fall on a weekend. That happens pretty much every year (when the unloved holiday lands on a weekday, and parents don't want to deal with shit). But now people are claiming it's been pushed back because of the storm that hit us. Yeah, sure.

Samuel Adams Merry Mischief - Gingerbread Stout (2012)

Limited Seasonal Release (First Year Beer)

22 fl. oz. / $6.69 USD / 9% ABV

About: "This rich dark gingerbread stout entices with the aromas of the holidays, hinting at the merriment and spices within. The flavor of gingerbread comes alive beginning with the smooth sweetness and heartiness of dark roasted malts and a touch of wheat. But it’s the intensity and spices of cinnamon, clove, nutmeg, & ginger that add a wicked kick for a jolly playful brew full of merry mischief.

To bring to life the gingerbread we wanted to create that distinctive richness and spicy kick.  We strengthened the dark stout and added a touch of flaked oats for a full body and smoothness.  The dark malts also give the beer a sweet roastiness with hints of cocoa and a slight nuttiness. Then come the spices with a combination of cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, and ginger for a layer of complexity and lingering heat. The cinnamon and clove create a peppery heat while the ginger and nutmeg create an earthiness that marries perfectly with the hops.  All of the ingredients come together to create that nostalgic taste of gingerbread for a festive and warming winter brew.

Malts: Samuel Adams two row pale malt blend, wheat, Special B, Paul’s roasted barley, and flaked oats / Hops: East Kent Goldings and Fuggles / Yeast Strain: Samuel Adams ale yeast / Special Ingredients: Cinnamon, Nutmeg, Cloves, & Ginger."

Thoughts: Merry Mischief poured a seriously dense ultra dark brown that turned pitch black, and featured a very dark beige and/or a light brown milk chocolate head atop.

This smells just like their Fat Jack! Typical... but I'll give it a chance, since it's made with the same spices and yeast. Alright, it only smells mostly the same at first. Once you get into it there's a darker, smokier tone to it...  it's very roasty, and a mix of chocolate and coffee, though neither of those are overpowering the other. It smells pretty awesome. There's an extinguished cigarette thing going on but it's pleasant. Something weird though... are hops actually coming through? No... wait, that's booze.

Very, very malty. Tinge of alcohol. Loads of ginger and vanilla here. It's got a real alcoholic frosting type taste to it. What's this, about 600 calories or so? Yeah, sounds about right. There's a lot of flavor overall, but it does fade pretty quick on the tongue leaving a dry haze from that cinnamon and a burn from that alcohol. It's a bit roasty, burnt, heavy, warm, a little bit acidic, heavily spiced and pretty much a dropped bomb. I don't hate it, no... in fact, while I'm not overly fond of it, I do happen to enjoy it quite a bit. Just because it reminds me so much of a Pumpkin Beer. Their Fat Jack particularly, only different.

Mouth feel is pretty thin for a stout. Watery, and such... sure it tasty for the most part. I wonder how it'll age. Perhaps in a few years it'll develop into a really nice IPA. What?! I said...

This is a cool beer. Not revolutionary by any means, and not really original, but I'm not going to sit here and complain. Most of the Sam Adams brews taste the same anyways, so at least this time they took one that I actually liked and made a Stout clone out of it. Who wouldn't have done the same thing?

Samuel Adams Fat Jack

Samuel Adams Fat Jack Double Pumpkin - Ale brewed with Pumpkin and Spices (2012)

1'st Batch Special Edition - Seasonal (Limited Release)

22 fl. oz. / $6.99 USD / 8.5% ABV

About: "Pleasantly plump and satisfied. This rich and luscious brew indulges in flavor with over 28 lbs. of pumpkin per barrel, for a full bodied sweetness and deep russet color. Classic pumpkin pie spices like cinnamon, nutmeg, and allspice ignite a warmth and spark that’s deepened by an undercurrent of toasty smoked malts. The result is a delectable brew full of enveloping layers of flavor and spice. Malts: Samuel Adams two-row pale malt blend, Rye, Special B, and Smoked Malt / Hops: East Kent Goldings and Fuggles / Yeast: Samuel Adams ale yeast / Special Ingredients: Real pumpkin, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and allspice."

Thoughts: Poured a dark ruby red color with a thick and frothy slightly yellow colored head.

Smells like sugar pumpkin cookies. Damn good! The scent is fairly strong, and gets stronger the longer you breathe in. It's got a real down to earth homemade pumpkin pie type scent. It doesn't smell incredibly sweet, but it's nothing mild either... it's like a classic and familiar pumpkin, and the spices aren't overwhelming to the point where you can't get the pumpkin. I really like how this one smells. There also seems to be a low lingering booze heat around the back. Let's see how it tastes:

First thing I got was a mix of that cinnamon and sugar, followed by an extremely malty tone and then after the swallow that nutmeg and allspice shot off like fireworks. There is quite a boozy taste to this one too which is a really fucking tart, and that ginger really gives it a hazy feel once you breathe in after each gulp. There's a decent bitterness to this, but it maintains a sound balance with the semi-sweetness. It's not syrupy or overly sweet and the spices aren't overpowering either, but don't let those words fool you into thinking this one has a weak taste, as it does not! After drinking half the bottle the cinnamon coats the tongue for a while, and the spice really starts to emerge strong. It does get a little smokey. Overall I'd say that this is a very good representation of the style. It's very middle ground in pretty much all categories, but it's damn tasty and the high ABV is always more than welcome.

Mouthfeel is a medium, but man it is Frothy! It explodes like foam in the mouth when you hold it in.

I just looked back on my Sam Adams Harvest Pumpkin Ale review, and found that it's very similar to this one. Everything from the color to the scent and even the taste... only this time things are a lot stronger. While the color and look is exactly the same, the smell is something that this time around really comes out at you. You don't have to try for it, because it's right there bursting and popping. The taste also comes out like a squishy pumpkin slammed over the dome! It's a lot heavier and that booze kick doesn't let up one bit. I like my beers boozy, with a strong taste (and as you may have noticed, I'm not really a fan of subtlety). There's a good chance I'll buy this one again if I can find it, perhaps for a mixer review.

Long Trail Pumpkin Ale

Pumpkin Ale Long Trail (2012)

Autumn Seasonal

12 fl. oz. / $1.66 USD / 5.5% ABV

About: "Long Trail is excited to launch Long Trail Pumpkin Ale, a slightly sweet seasonal treat artfully brewed with pumpkins, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and cloves. The perfect drink for a fall day, this exceptionally balanced beer has an aroma very reminiscent of pumpkin pie. Malts: 2-Row, Wheat, Caramel 80L, and Caramunich / Hops: Nugget, Mt. Hood, Willamette / All Natural Ingredients: Pumpkins, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and cloves."

Thoughts: Poured a very rich orange orange color with an off white head that popped like crazy until it remained only a puddle of foam in the middle and edging the glass. Carbonation seems low and the beer is slightly cloudy.

The first whiff I got off this was incredible. Very sweet and inviting. Next few sniffs and it got slightly more harsh. There's a good amount of spice in the nose, and a peppery tone that comes through after a short while. It's seemingly smokey.

Taste starts out pretty bitter, followed by a gentle tingling of cinnamon and a slow flow of the allspice / nutmeg mix. Second gulp is very peppery, smokey and of course there's a heavy malt base present. It's decent. Not really sour, not really sweet... it's mild, got a gentle bitterness, and doesn't taste overly cloved. It's pretty good.

It's pretty crisp and clean feeling. Aftertaste is soft and smooth.

For what it is, I think I may actually like this more than their Imperial Pumpkin... strange. That never happens. It's a bit more watery than I'd prefer, and of course overall it's got a mild taste to it. But it's not too bad. In the case of both Pumpkin Ales from Long Trail, the scent is more appealing than the actual taste. I'm the sort of guy that likes "in your face" beers when it comes to taste though. These ones had a strangely unique taste to them too, which I imagine must be from the state they're brewed in.

Long Trail Imperial Pumpkin

Long Trail Imperial Pumpkin - Ale brewed with Pumpkin and Spices (2012)

Autumn Seasonal (Limited Release - First Batch).

22 fl. oz. / $6.94 USD / 8% ABV

2013 Artwork

About: "Long Trail Imperial Pumpkin Ale is the latest introduction to the Long Trail Brewmaster Series. This limited release seasonal treat is small batch brewed with pumpkins, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and cloves with increased malts and a touch of bitterness for the perfect balance. Malts: 2-Row, Wheat, Caramel 80L, and Caramunich / Hops: Nugget, Mt. Hood, Willamette."

Thoughts: Poured a slightly dark orange-brown honey color with an oatmeal color head that dissolved pretty quickly. This beer is very murky. Murky and hazy. Maximum carbonation.

This one smells pretty uncooked. Not overly sweet scented like pumpkin pie brews, but rather like a moderately spiced mash. Kinda fruity. Smells a bit smokey around the back of it... like cigarette ash.

Major booze sting on first gulp. Tartness. Took a bigger second gulp and there's still that booze so don't consider this one well hidden by any means. It's lightly spiced, heavy on the pulpy taste and just edging on sour. The beer is extremely malty. It's got some mild cinnamon here and is pretty heavy on the clove, and with the mix of those (the drying of the cinnamon and the flavor of the clove) makes you feel as if you just smoked a clove cigarette. It all becomes nutty as you get into it, like cashews or peanuts. A very strange brew.

Mouth feel is light and airy. A little bit foamy around the end and leaves a little bit of the sticky stuff behind.

Previous

Overall I find this beer a bit more sour than I usually like. The sweetness here is pretty much non-existent and the abundance of building spice as you continue to drink doesn't really compliment the bitterness all too well. That being said, it's not horrible. There just seems to be a lot more "beer" flavor coming through as opposed to pumpkin beer... how do I phrase this? It's as if I'm drinking a beer that is in itself two different entities. While it's blended, I'm feeling more of an individual vibe from each of the flavors here. It's weird. While the flavor of this beer falls off really quick, it's got a really nice aftertaste.

Long Trail Imperial Pumpkin - Ale brewed with Pumpkin and Spices (2013)

Autumn Seasonal (Limited Release - Second Batch).

22 fl. oz. / $6.99 USD / 8% ABV

Second Thoughts: Poured a dark cinnamon color with a thick and frothy orange cream colored head.

Smells great. Spices hit up front with ginger, black pepper, nutmeg, a little cinnamon sugar, and crayola crayons.

Yup. Tastes like crayons. This is like the mystery at the pumpkin wax museum. The smell is definitely better than the taste... but it's not completely horrid. There's a lot of black peppery spice which I like since I like that kind of thing. It's very malty. A little bit funky and earthy. Spicy. And a tad sour.

The new artwork got me this time around, as did the whole thought of revisiting pumpkin ales, but I'm not really much of a fan of this one overall. Totally way better label for 2013 though.

Mixing Brews #5

Uinta Oak JACKED Imperial Pumpkin (2011) "VS" Woodstock Inn Autumn Ale Brew (2012)

WHAT'S GOIN' ON: Happy Halloween... Motherfuckers! It's that time of year again. Aw yeah. Time to poison small children Oh wayt, I mean fuck hot bitches no, that can wait too, uhh... fuck hot poisoned small children's bitches?! Combining those two things doesn't really come out right. I've been watching too much Epic Beer Time. But wait!, what's this!? I'm posting another beer review! (how exciting) and on Halloween!? Well, pathetic as it is... I'd carve a piece of my heart out tonight, if I had any of it left.

No matter the case though and drunken ramblings aside, tonight I'm doing a little self poisoning of my own by mixing these two incredibly delicious toxins: JACKED, and Oak Aged Imperial Pumpkin Ale that clocks in at 10.31% ABV (Get it?), with quite possibly the best tasting beer you'll ever find under 5% (this one is a 4.4%): Autumn Ale Brew! Looks like I'm in for one hell of a tricked out treat tonight.

HOW IT WENT DOWN: Me poured about a third from each bottle into this pint glass here. Head faded rather quickly, but left some bubbly puddles here and there.

While the colors for both beers are similar, this maintained more of the Jacked attributes with its darkness and gloom. It's a dark and cloudy reddish orange with light carbonation.

The Autumn Ale Brew brings the apple cinnamon pastry to this pumpkin party and now this mix smells exactly like Pumpkin Pie. It's marvelous! The wood and heavy booze from the Jacked is a bit subdued, but this concoction is no doubt ten times sweeter smelling than the two of these awesome beers alone.

The taste is, and there's no other way to describe this, just pure unadulterated bliss. It's instant gratification in liquid form! You get all that cinnamon, candy apples, pumpkin pie, sweet and sour, and a gentle fade out. This mix is probably one of the sweetest and most flavorful brews I've ever had, for such a gentle ride. The booze from that Jacked bottle really hides out here, I can't even get a hint of it. This spiced ale mix is the stuff that this season is made of.

Mouth is light to medium, a little watery, tingling, sticky, and fiery.

Due to the oak aging in the Jacked, mixed with the low ABV of the Autumn Ale Brew, this one does fade a bit fast and leaves a watery and wood toned aftertaste. The cinnamon lingers the most, but it was all great while it lasted.

Uinta JACKED Oak Aged Imperial Pumpkin Ale

Uinta Jacked - Oak Aged Imperial Pumpkin Ale (2011)

Limited Autumn Seasonal.

25.4 fl. oz. / $12.99 USD / 10.31% ABV

About: "Uinta Brewing Company introduces the newest addition to their Crooked Line of beers, Oak Jacked Imperial Wood Aged Pumpkin Ale. “Jacked” is a very limited, seasonal beer, only 850 cases were produced (in 2011).

Jacked is brewed with fresh pumpkin and fall spices and has been aging in Oak barrels for 6 months. The oak barrels add subtle nuances of toasted vanilla and bourbon notes. With an ABV of 10.31% (a play on the date of Halloween), Jacked is a big, unique pumpkin ale.

Continuing with the spirit of the Crooked Line, Utah artist Trent Call was commissioned to design the Jacked label. Each bottle is a work of art. Pop the cork and pair Oak Jacked with flavors of the season!"

Thoughts: Decided not to struggle with the cork on this one and took the scissor claw to it. Why? Because my hand hurts from doing manly things... like plowing (if you know that I mean), and jerking (if you know what I mean), and strangling bitches to d... (if y...), and on top of that, it's drinkin' time! Not time to break a sweat on some impossible to open brew. Hell, it's hard enough cracking thighs op... I mean, things open, while tying rope (if you know what I)

Jacked poured a dark and sinister, hazy burnt orange. It's got a bit of some reddish-brown tones to it, maybe even a little auburn. It is really, really cloudy, and the colors are shadowed and / or shining off the light from whichever angle I view this glass. The yellowy orange head was huge to fluff up and eventually left a half moon ring around the edges.

Smells fan-fuckin'-tastic! It's rich and spicy, very boozy, tons of malt... it's like layer upon layer of circling aromas. Gingerbread cookies, pumpkin pie with whipped cream, chocolate and vanilla ice cream cake doused with rum(!). It smells like a frosty cold night in front of a bonfire. Kinda makes me miss those old times I would make a rainbow connection at the beach and leave with sand crabs (if you know wha

First gulp, and yeah, me happy. Up front it's got a rich malty sweetness that's slowly chizzled away by a mini -onslaught of cinnamon, pepper, clove, nutmeg and ginger, finally giving way to a slightly sour mash of pumpkin and some falling leaves. This beer is incredibly flavorful, and tastes really good too... but it seems to fade just a little fast. That could just be the oak barrels though, as that woodsy flavor creeps in and takes over just as the spice boom dies off.

The feel is super smooth and just a little watery. It's sticky and coating, and that cinnamon leaves a dust in the mouth, but it's not really drying at all.

Overall this is a great representation of a pumpkin ale. Drinking the final few gulps straight out of the bottle and I'm really loving that harsh, oaked and boozy feel about the whole brew. I wonder what this years version tastes like? After all, there's nothing like a fresh, ripe pumpkin... if you know what I mean.

Avery Rumpkin

Avery Rumpkin - Ale Brewed with Pumpkin and Spices and Aged in Rum Barrels (2012)

Limited Seasonal Release.

12 fl. oz. / $10.99 USD / 18.1% ABV

About: "We wondered what would happen if a monstrous pumpkin ale, plump full of spicy gourdiness, were aged in extremely fresh Gosling's Rum barrels to add suggestions of delicate oak and candied molasses. Rumpkin is what happened! This first member of the Annual Barrel-Aged Series was brewed with roasted pumpkins from a local Boulder County farm, and spiced with nutmeg, cinnamon, and ginger. Barrel Type and Time: Dark Rum Barrels, 6 months / Malt Variety: Aromatic, Honey Malt… and Pumpkins!"

Thoughts: Rumpkin poured a thick, murky, dark burnt orange color with medium carbonation (very unexpected) and a head that dissipated during the pour itself.

The scent on this monstrocity is heavy, dangerous and pretty damn good. Up front it's strong booze and rum. Once you get past that barrel aging though, the strong ale starts to come through. It's mildly sweet and the spices are blending well. There's a mix of dark fruit notes here, but the longer you take it in, it mellows out to an earthy mild pumpkin puree.

First gulp, here we go. It starts off with a strong haze of rum, a blast of booze, it's instantly warming and wow... its a "dooozy". After the swallow, the blending of tastes start to really come through. As I breath in I'm getting the wood from those barrels. It's pretty cool. This beer starts off very spicy, and not only is it spicy, but it's hot! I'm getting tons of burnt sugar, brown sugar, molasses, figs and raisin. After the swallow the spices hit hard and heavy with a single peppery cinnamon explosion, then the strong ale comes through and slowly rides out, exposing flavors of nutmeg and ginger. Caramel comes in strong about halfway in, once the tongue adjusts to the strength. It's got a sort of cold pumpkin pie slice with french vanilla ice cream on top drizzled in steaming hot caramel type vibe. Slight hints of cocoa and cinnamon rolls.

This beer is pretty light on the tongue. It's silky and very coating, but not too heavy.

Aside from being a great pumpkin beer, this is a great beer in general. While I absolutely love the strength in this one, and while the flavor is superb, this one doesn't raise above the ranks of Pumking for me. They are two totally different beers mind you, and I'd grab a bottle of each no matter what... but as far as Pumpkin Beer goes, nothin' beats the King.

Cambridge Brewing 2012 Pumpkin Beer Festival

Freaks, Geeks and Weirdos - and not to mention some Totally Hot Babes - all united yesterday for a fun filled elbow to elbow beer-breath-a-thon in Cambridge, Mass, known as LineFest! Uhhh, I mean PumpkinFest. Well, it was LineFest for anyone who got there after 2:30 PM, as the small venue was jam f'n packed with thirsty hipsters and pumpkin-lovin' nerdlings alike! Everybody was in the pumpkin pool. A couple of times I even stood in line for a few minutes, only to realize that it wasn't even a line. What in the fuck is that? Just a bunch of people standing around near a line that's so bombarded by other lines that it's nothing short of a rabid zombie horde. There were lines everywhere man. People were getting felt up... warm, wet breath hit the back of necks... boobs were grazed... crotches were pressed upon unsuspecting

And did I mention totally hot babes? Well, there were some pretty hot babes there. One girl looked like Mary Jane's slightly thicker sister. She was wearing a hello kitty shirt and was by far the hottest chick at the place (I fell instantly in lust)... she was Gourd-gous! And there were quite a few ladies there in ultra-tight leather and pleather and spandex outfits as Bayonetta, Black Widow and Baroness. OK, they were all Black Widow. Or trying to be. Whatever. The point is they were hot, and babes too. There was also a guy in a low budget homemade old-school Captain America outfit that really looked the part, so well done on him. Oh, and the girl in the red cloak that works there was really jacking my lantern. If you know what I

Also, I don't know if there were really so many hipsters there, or if they were just dressed up that way for the costume party? Hey, is everyone utilizing Belgian Yeast in their beer now? I thought my tongue was playing tricks on me, but apparently not. I rinsed out my cup each time before getting my next beers, but I could still taste that Belgian Yeast! I thought I didn't clean the cup well enough, but in fact it was because nearly every beer I drank at the place has it in it. What gives? Anyways, I got there at 12:30, a half hour before the doors opened, and ended up being in the middle of a huge ass line down and around the block. The last half of my stay at the establishment, people weren't being allowed to enter until someone else left. So that sucks for them... I guess? But I read that you gotta go either early or late to these things so, yeah. Since I like to get my drinking out of the way early

Onto the hot babes beers:

1. The Bruery Autumn Maple - Belgian Style Brown Ale (2012)

Brewed by The Bruery, in Placentia, CA. USA.

4 fl. oz. / 1 Ticket / 10% ABV

About: "Brewed with 17 lbs. of yams per barrel (in other words, a lot of yams!), this Autumn Seasonal is a different take on the “Pumpkin” beer style. Brewed with Cinnamon, Nutmeg, Allspice, Vanilla, Molasses, and Maple Syrup, and fermented with our traditional Belgian Yeast strain, this bold and spicy beer is perfect on a cold autumn evening."

Thoughts: Autumn Maple. Alright. Oh, The Bruery. Sweet. This looks to be a  good beer to start with. Autumn Maple poured a thick and cloudy burnt orange color with a small white bubbly head.

It's a light smelling ale, toasty, very lightly spiced.... I'm getting loads of Belgian Yeast. There's a little bit of cinnamon lingering about, and a real subtle blend of spices. For a 10%, I expected more of a scent on this one, not one so mild.

It's very tasty. There's a harsh booze sting on the first sip, and I guess that's where that strength was. I'm really trying to get that maple syrup here, it's what I want to taste. Feel is about a medium  and it's a bit fizzy. There's a sticky quality to this beer, and I guess that's the maple syrup coming into play, but it's not really all too evident in the taste itself. I guess I should expect that by now though. However, the beer is very pleasant tasting, and has a classic type taste for the Autumn season. Gotta love those yams! And it's strong, which is always a plus.

2. Hill Farmstead Autumn Saison - Belgian Farmhouse Ale  (2012?)
Brewed by Hill Farmstead Brewery, in Greensboro, VT. USA.

4 fl. oz. / 1 Ticket / 5.5% ABV

About: "Shaun Hill's 1'st Pumpkin Beer, brewed in collaboration with Jackie O's Brewing Co. and Grassroots Brewing after years of goading from Will Myers. A simple malt bill provides an orange hue. Ben's Pumpkins from Snug Valley Farm provided the requisite squash. The goal: A complex Belgian style pumpkin ale with little to no spicing."

Thoughts: This beer is a very light orange color, especially light compared to the rest actually, but it's still a pretty orange. Kinda murky too. The head was tiny and not condensed at all.

There's a lot of malt in the scent, and it's very straightforward. An underlying Belgian yeast comes up from the back, but overall everything here seems pretty light.

The taste is pretty damn sour. It's very mushy tasting. It gets slightly peppery once that yeast kicks in, and once all the flavors mingle together the beer gets more of a fruity tone about it. Still pretty sour though.

Mouth is light and that sour tone brings on the puckering.

3. Stewart's Brewing Mischief Night - Pumpkin Ale (2012)

Brewed by Stewart's Brewing Company, in Bear, DE. USA.

4 fl. oz. / 1 Ticket / 5.5% ABV

About:  "Many innocent pumpkins met a gruesome fate so that you sadistic people could have your annual spiced treat. We hope you're happy! Straight from the mind of the ‘Beer Admiral’ himself. Head Brewer Rick Hoffman presents a ‘traditional’ spiced pumpkin ale. Rick added over 10 lbs of pumpkin per barrel. Brewed with a touch of Maize for softness, and to fit the harvest spirit. Spiced with a custom blend of whole botanicals including Cinnamon, Ginger, Allspice, Cloves and Nutmeg."

Thoughts: Mischief Night. What a cool name huh? This one poured a reddish-orange with a minimal haze to it. One of the filtered offering of the venue perhaps. The head was pretty frothy, yet faded quickly.

This beer smells really sweet. Kind of like spiced apples, or strawberry syrup! Really cool.

The taste is unique. It's rich and malty, but with a weird kind of tang to it. Not bad at all. It's sweet, spicy and has a a mild sourness to it that creeps up on you.

It's pretty frothy. I'm sure the corn brings it back from being a total malt bomb, but the more you sip this one the sweeter it gets. Is that cloying sweetness? It's a very interesting brew, that's for sure.

4. Elysian Headless Horsey - Pumpkin Brett Beer (2011/2012?)

Brewed by Elysian Brewing Company, in Seattle, WA. USA.

8 fl. oz. / 4 Tickets / 6.7% ABV / SPECIAL TAPPING: 2 PM!

About: "100% Brettanomyces-fermented Pumpkin Ale brewed with Pale and Wheat malts and unmalted wheat. With some time to age, it has become more of an elegant thoroughbred than drayhorse. The inspiration for this beer? They thought of the name first, and knew they had to brew it." What the hell kind of description is that?

Thoughts: Headless Horsey poured a super cloudy auburn orange hue with no head whatsoever, which was weird.

And speaking of weird, this one smells weird as shit too! It's very tart, kinda like pineapple juice. Pineapple juice... and funk. Yeah. Not incredibly pleasant.

The taste is a sour pineapple hit to the mouth. Whew! This is a strange ass beer, man. I'm not really diggin' it all too much. And by the looks of things, the people that just got this brew before me aren't really into it either. There's a lot of strange WTF faces around and some not too flattering banter on this one.

This is the funkiest one so far. Like watered down juice with a double extra tart thrown in, and a touch of funk.

5. Cambridge Brewing Valley Ghoul - Scotch Ale with Pumpkin and Heather Flowers (2011)

4 fl. oz. / 2 Tickets / 8.5% ABV

About: "2011 Strong Scotch Ale with Pumpkins and local barley. Our Valley Girl series of local-ingredient-beers gets ghoulish with barley grown and malted in MA from our Valley Malt BSA. Super rich malt character presides over Pumpkin, Brown Sugar, Molasses, and Heather Flowers in the finish. Subtle, like a swift kick in the kilt. Adding pumpkins was a seasonal no-brainer, and a last-minute addition of heather flowers contributes subtle, delicate floral notes to this robust, malty beer. Enjoy, and Happy Halloween!"

Thoughts: Valley Ghoul poured a dark and gloomy raspberry red / orangy brown color and was very hazy. The head was small due to the pour but lasted a long while.

This smells Awesome! Wait, what the hell... bubblegum just came rushing in. Oh, and loads of booze! It's flowery, and well, just an insane mix of things going on. This is like a Bride of Frankenbeer.

The taste is hard caramel, molasses, and literally tons of brown sugar. This is some serious malt. It's intense. Very sweet, a little peppery, and then those Heather Flowers come in again and it's bubblegum booze.

There's a bit too much bubblegum for my liking, but I did enjoy the hell out of this one while it lasted. And I'm sure there's a market for a beer like this. A weird market.

6. Cambridge Brewing Kraftwerk - Belgian Tripel brewed with Pumpkins and Aged in White Wine Barrels (2011)

4 fl. oz. / 2 Tickets / 9.75% ABV

About: "Kraftwerk is brewed in the style of a Belgian strong ale known as Tripel, but to it we have added hundreds of pounds of pumpkin, along with a very subtle addition of assorted autumnal spices. After a very warm fermentation with our house Belgian ale yeast, Kraftwerk was sent to the CBC Barrel Cellar to age for several months in Sauvignon Blanc barrels where the beer transmogrified into a striking beverage like no other. The result is a classic version of a traditional Tripel, with subtle pumpkin flavors, and notes of oak and a white wine-like finish. The combination of esters from fermentation, barrel aging, and lingering wine character has created a beer with crazy fruitiness, a super dry and sparkling body, and a grape/stone fruit/tropical finish. Simply unlike any pumpkin beer you've ever had."

Thoughts: Werk poured a lighter yellowy orange color with a fluffed white top. The beer is of course quite hazy.

Scent is on the lighter side of things, but really interesting and inviting. It's fruity, and you get a big presence of that white wine. It's pretty cool. Smells a bit like fruit cocktail after a while. Nice.

This tastes excellent! You really get that mix of the oak and white wine straight away. There's a lot of ripe pear, mild squash, and a ton of fruitiness. The spices have all but been lost in the mix, and you wouldn't immediately think of this as a "pumpkin beer", but that flavor is still inherent to the beer. Only muted. Overall though this is a really interesting beer, it has some intriguing layers of taste and it's just "delightful".

7. Cambridge Brewing Fire and Brimstone - Cask-conditioned Ale with Chipotle Peppers and Cacao Nibs (2012)

4 fl. oz. / 2 Tickets / 6.66% ABV

About: "S.A.T.D cask-conditioned with Ancho, Chipotle, and Habanero Peppers, plus Cinnamon Sticks, Cacao Nibs, and Dried Pumpkin Flakes. Rich, chocolaty, smokey and maybe a little hot. You have no one but yourself to blame!"

Thoughts: Yeah, I suppose after that I may as well hit up the beer with the Habaneros in it. Why the hell not wreck the palate after that whimsical brew above.

This beer is dark. It smells harsh. There's tons of chilies in this. A smile, comes to my face.

That's hot. Not only is this beer just spicy as all hell on the first gulp, but it's got a creeper quality about it too, because halfway through that burn is just rushing in and doesn't let up. There's a nice mingling of flavors going on here. The chocolate really takes a backseat to the peppery flavor and the smoke, and for that I am thankful.

Fire and Brimstone is super tasty, has a slight tartness to it, is rich, malty and brings the heat. Did I taste the dried pumpkin flakes? Nah... but whatever.

8. Elysian The Gourdfather - Pumpkin Barleywine (2012)

4 fl. oz. / 2 Tickets / 11.2% ABV

About: "The Gourdfather is a Pumpkin Barleywine you can’t refuse, mellowing with age but still reminding you who’s boss. A veritable pushcart of malt bill brings Pale, Munich, Cara-hell, Cara-vienne, C-15 Crystal and Pumpkin Seeds up against a rival neighborhood armed with Magnum hops. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

Thoughts: Gourdfather poured an auburn red, honey like color with a foamy white head atop.

This smells like red wine. Ah, memories. There's a super strong barley flow to this one, but at the same time the hops and seeds give off this weird otherworldly type scent to it. It smells slightly acidic and maybe a little bitter. It's pretty cool.

The taste is unexpectedly more sweet than I had expected. It was a bit of a shock. There's not much of that red wine vibe in the taste, but rather a booming slam from those malts. It's slightly tart, there's a heavy dose of dark fruit, plums especially, and a lot of sweetness. After a while some caramel notes start to come out and it gets a little twang from that fruitiness and the hops.

Despite being so heavy and rich, this is some easy drinking.

9. Iron Hill Ichabod - Imperial Pumpkin Ale (2012)

Brewed by Iron Hill Brewery, in West Chester, PA. USA.

4 fl. oz. / 2 Tickets / 9.5% ABV

About: "This extra strong spicy Belgian Pumpkin Ale is truly a beer from the farm. It is unfiltered with a beautiful burnt orange color. Ichabod’s nose is filled with flavors of the harvest including Clove, Allspice, Cinnamon, and Nutmeg. The palette is sweet with hints of Roasted Pumpkin, and Caramel. There is a warming finish that is both fruity and aromatic. Over 6 pounds of pumpkin per barrel were added right to the mash. Drink enough and you’ll lose your head too!"

Thoughts: This beer poured a semi-dark auburn haze that's blood orange in color. The head was extremely minimal.

I'm picking up scents of light bubblegum (again!?), toasty malt, a little bit of booze. The spices are light, and aside from that roasted tone to it, it seems pretty mild.

Well, it tastes a bit rubbery. It's malty and the spices are indeed light. Not really too interesting of a beer. It's kind of got this burnt embers mixed with old He-Man toys going on. I've tasted beers with similar problems, and this one isn't too offensive in that area, but it's there. This beer is very boozy, but it's also pretty meh.

Mouth on this one is slightly drying, but I have been ingesting good dose of cinnamon throughout the day. Not to mention that oak. But the drying is just starting to hit after this one particularly so take that into consideration.

10. Stewart's Brewing Gourdzilla - Pumpkin Ale (2012)

8 fl. oz. / 4 Tickets / 8.666% ABV / SPECIAL TAPPING: 4 PM!

About: "This Monstrous Pumpkin Ale is brewed with Radioactive Pumpkins grown at a secret location in the South Pacific, and fermented with Genetically Modified yeast. Gourdzilla is sure to please even the most finicky pumpkin zombies, and still have time to lay waste to Tokyo in its spare time."

Thoughts: Radioactive Pumpkins huh?

Gourdzilla poured a honey gold with orange tones, and featured a frothy light beige head on top. This one's got the biggest head out of all the beers so far. Huh. Must be that "Genetically Modified Yeast"!

The smell starts off with a "traditional" Imperial Pumpkin Ale style scent, which is promising since none of the other beers so far have had this. Spices are present, but a little light, and I can actually smell the water in this one. It's nice.

The taste is very peppery up front. This one isn't too sweet, not too bitter, and while the taste is rich and savory, it feels a little light. There's no kick to this beer, and that's a bit unfortunate. It's the closest thing to tasting pumpkin out of this lineup though, and it's still pretty good.

I guess everything in some way will always be compared to Pumking. If this one had a longer linger to it and a spicier kick, it could very well compete.

11. Cambridge Brewing Grey Ghost - Belgain-Style Double White Ale with Grey Ghost Pumpkins (2012)

12 fl. oz. / 3 Tickets / 6.75% ABV

About: "300 pounds of Grey Ghost heirloom pumpkins from Sylvan Nursery flavor this strong version of a traditional Belgian White Ale, along with Orange Peel, Coriander, and Grains of Paradise. Freshly chopped and shredded, the pumpkin is added to a mash of Pilsner and wheat malt, raw wheat, and flaked oats and fermented with our house Belgian yeast."

Thoughts: Ghost poured a light gold, yellowy orange color. It's slightly hazy and the white head left a ring around the top of the brew for a long while.

The scent is sweet and tart, and of course that Belgian yeast is making an appearance. There's some mild zest and a gentle flow of spice to this one.

The taste, just like the last beer and many other pumpkin beers, is peppery at first. This one has got a heavy taste to it though from that mash. It's also very fruity on the tongue... that orange peel really brings some nice citrusy tones to the brew, and there's almost like a lemon lime thing going on. The wheat and grey ghost pumpkins really blend well and I think adding coriander was a nice choice.

It's slightly watery, and goes down smooth. 

To me, most of these beers are more of an experiment in brewing rather than what's normally classified as a "Pumpkin Ale". These are like "Ale with Pumpkin in it" instead. Of course, I didn't try anything that I have already tasted before when I went to this event. They had Pumking, DFH Punkin, Weyerbacher Imperial Pumkin, Heavy Seas and a slew of others. I forgot to try Wormtown's offerings, but I'm not going to cry over it. What I really wanted to try was the Ultra-Rare Allagash Ghoulschip (a Barrel Aged Sour Pumpkin Ale brewed on Halloween night 2008 and aged in oak!), but they were tapping that at 8 PM and I wasn't going to stay that long. They tapped the Avery Rumpkin about forty-five minutes after I left as well, but I just drank that a few days ago.

I had a real mellow time at this extremely festive event. The overly large Pumpkin Ravioli was a really sweet and good tasting dish, though I should have saved some cash and ate a Sausage with Pumpkin Mustard outside. And it would have been a lot more comfortable it I wasn't rushed off of my table, but they've got time limits set up so I don't really give a fuck. Plus it was hot in there. It was just the hovering that bugged me. I also would have liked the Pint Glass to have the pumpkin design from their previous logo above. It looks a lot more sinister with that jagged mouth. Will I ever go to another one of these? Probably. Will I do reviews? Not sure. I would of loved to have drank tons of Pumking on tap and chased it with Rumpkin, but hey, I like trying the new shit. Maybe next time. Hopefully there will be more Totally Hot Babes for me to