Fast-forward something like thirty years later and cue the 'you knew it was coming' nightmare as Camden (Robert Sabin) awakens in a cold sweat, again. He does what he normally must in this situation and starts to lift weights! He's working out, sweating like a prison inmate, looking at the picture of his dead parents on the table in front of him and getting flashbacks of their deaths. This shit is getting intense!! His eyes bulging, you can tell there's a fury inside of him... but wherever it is inside, it must be pretty deep.
See, Camden has (as we come to find out) agoraphobia, which is a rare condition where a person develops a split personality, dresses up as a bat and furiously pleases himself to late night 1-900 commercials on the tube. Actually, Camden never leaves his home. His whole life since his parent's deaths, he's been taken care of by his (their?) lawyer / adoptive protector Donald, and raised on their trust funds. He has his food and groceries delivered to him by the same Asian guy each week (who he has come to trust) and the third and only other person he lets into his apartment is the super (who seems to have an obsessive compulsive desire to change batteries in the smoke detectors every three god damn days).
He goes to the door one day to get his groceries, and through the peephole he finds not his regular guy, but instead some scraggly looking dude in a black bandanna. He opens the door slowly and cue the OMINOUS MUSIC. This metal-head doesn't seem the most trustworthy guy on the job, as he doesn't stay outside the door as directed while Cam goes to get his money, but instead comes in and proceeds to f'n case the joint. Here we get a great scene of acting on Sabin's part as when he comes back and finds the guy in his apartment, he closes his robe with a displeased and puzzled look on his face - classic. Is this just another one of those daily things that agoraphobics go through, or it is something more?
We're introduced now to one of Cam's favorite pastimes: Watching from his telescope down at the prostitute in front of the theater, her pimp standing not too far behind as she offers tricks to turn. Those wacky New Yorkers sure do crack him up.
Lawyer Donald comes by the house on one of his regular visits, and greets Cam with a stack of magazines. "You must be on every mailing list in the state. Is there anything you don't read?"
The interviewing portion of the meet and greet doesn't seem to last too long as Randy tells Camden that he's an Orphan. Which of course, upon hearing the news, Cam's eyes light up. The sooner he can move in, the better.
This is the point where we hit that magical interlude when Randy is shown to us and not the film's protagonist as the evil being he truly is. He makes his way back to the place where he was squatting with (who you'll recognize as) the metal-head grocery delivery guy(!) and some drugged up girl who's kept around for kicks. Or at least, that's what Randy thought, before he gets into a minor squabble. As she's told to go powder her nose, Randy exclaims that he is displeased with having her around, but metal-head isn't having any part of it. The girl stays, and they're going to carry out their nefarious plan to completely hallow out Camden's apartment. "The guy's a total shut-in. There's no way we're getting him out of there." Randy says. Metal-head is up for suggestion and Randy devises a plan so ingenious, so diabolikal that it would make the freakin' Riddler blush... he's gonna get Cam wasted, get him laid and build up the guy's confidence. It's brilliant, man!
So begineth the male bonding! They're sitting on the couch when another one of those creatively made 1-900 number commercials comes on the tube. "You ever call one of those things?" Randy asks. "All the time..." "Camden, you ever get laid?" There's an awkward silence. "I came close once, in high school.. then my parents died and it didn't work out." They share a bit from that moment on, talking about their parents, and of course, chicks...
"Chicks are great, as long as you keep 'em in line. But friends are forever."
Pretty soon you'll start to notice a bit of a trend concerning Randy. He never lets something as menial as a chick come between a friendship. Later in the middle of the night, Camden awakes to strange noises, only to find the window shades crackling in the wind. When he closes the window and turns around, grocery delivery guy pulls a gun and the planned robbery is in full effect. Well, at least it would have been, if not for Randy, who jumps out from the shadows and stabs his former partner in crime to death.
This brings us to the single best bloodied underwear shot in cinematic history! Move over Schramm, Naked Fear got your number and just gave it to every single automatic dialer in town.
So Randy takes care of things there, and decides to get some unfinished business done. First on the top of his list, head to the local cinema to buy cocaine for the young lass back home waiting. Of course, this is no regular drug as he heads off to the bathroom to mix rat poison into it. Suddenly, two strapping young lads(arm in arm) come busting in. "Get the fuck out of here!" yells Randy and they take off. [Another hilarious audio commentary moment: "We'll just go to the ladies room instead." ... "Yeah, they're not mixing rat poison and coke in the ladies room."] So one former friend and his girl are snuffed at the hands of our anti-hero. Now it's off to make good with his new buddy Camden, what better than a present to tide things over?
All the while Camden is trying to expand his social life, by of course calling up more of those naughty 1-900 numbers. He starts talking with a girl, but this time he makes a rainbow connection, decides to come clean and tells her who he really is. They're both unsure but he tells her his number, and surprisingly she calls him back. He's all smiles at this point and heads to bed happy. That's when Randy returns with his gift: A hooker with a heart of gold, who (finally, in one of Lamberson's films), gets naked. Alright.
Julie, a former telemarketer and as we come to find out, rape victim, isn't all too comfortable with closeness, but she takes a chance by meeting Camden in his home. They chat for a while, share an ale together, and dance for a short bit before Cam goes in for a kiss and she has a bit of a freak-out. She leaves the apartment and Camden in despair, though later Randy comforts him saying "Maybe she's damaged goods. I wouldn't let it get you down."
Camden: "The PROSTITUTE you brought me the other night!"
Randy tells Camden that everything is going to be OK, the pimp doesn't even know him, and there's nothing to worry about. Cam accepts this and they go on with their lives. Julie calls up Camden later and apologizes for rushing off like that. They both meet up again and discuss their lives. Both of them have personal demons they want to get past, and perhaps they can do that together.
"You wanted a best friend. Well you got one for life. And I'm not going anywhere. You don't understand the responsibilities that go with friendship. You never dump a friend for a chick. Never." Camden isn't budging and Randy isn't leaving. After all, they're friends and why would Randy desert his best friend in his darkest hour? Randy even goes the extra mile and cooks a meal for him, only to leave it outside his door. But later in the night when Randy is suffering from nightmares of his parent's abuse, Camden wakes up to find him sitting on his bed, smoking a cigarette (or was that twenty of them?). This is where we learn the truly awful fate of Randy's parents. He killed them!
"Nice try Cam.. But I think it's time for you to come out of the closet."
And he does, with a staple gun and a vengeance!
Or is it? Not really.
Well, I'll spoil the rest of it for you. Here's a bit of the dialogue, when Randy comes back for revenge and gives Camden the ultimatum only a true psycho could: "Rape this bitch or I'll paint the walls with her blood! Do it or I'll put a bullet through her head and fuck the hole..." Of course you know what happens next... surprise ending. But this ain't no Casablanca, baby... you know Randy is going to take a dive and Camden is going to get the girl. Right?
Also, as a side note before I end, this is the first and only movie that I've seen where the final credits show a montage of funny outtakes, while a very offensive rap track plays over the whole thing. Greatness.
It comes highly recommended.