November 5, 2010

Psyched about Sucker Punch (2011)!


That's correct. I am once again, psyched about an upcoming film. That film? SuckerPunch! Why am I fiending to see this one? Hmm... Does the name Emily Browning (The Uninvited)  in a sexy schoolgirl uniform wielding a samurai sword say anything to you!? Well, I'll let it be known once again at this time that I do in fact desire Emily Browning in more ways than one. She is so goddess. I could drown in those eyes and that face.

"A young girl is institutionalized by her wicked stepfather. Retreating to an alternative reality as a coping strategy, she envisions a plan which will help her escape from the facility." Mental institutions. Young hot chicks. Escapism. Japanese gatling-gun wielding demons. Dragons. Robots. Young hot chicks. Fuck it, I'm in! Zack Snyder directs, and while some seem to find annoyances with his directorial style, I must disagree with them and state that the guy is indeed on top of his shit when it comes to this kind of film. The Watchmen proves it. That movie is fucking glorious!

Throw in Carla Gugino, Jena Malone and Vanessa Hudgens along with Abbie Cornish and Jamie Chung (all of them in sexy and crazy outfits) and you've got what the Expendables should have looked like! Not dudes. Carla and Jena are definitely cool with me. I don't know Abbie or Jamie, and Hudgens, well, I guess Zack likes taking them from cradle to the brothel. I just wish Sofia Vergara could have been somehow involved with the project... but then again, I think that about everything lately. I make up for it by incorporating pictures of her into my own personal "projects" so I guess it's all A-OK! If you know what I mean. Damn, that Sofia is funny as hell, gorgeous and downright molestable.

But yeah, 2.35:1, IMAX, Slow-mo Snyder, and grrl pwwr? What's not to lust? Watch the Trailers! 1 and 2. Baby Doll is obviously crazy. Insane out of her damn mind and just too damn sexy to boot! Just the way I like em! And trust me when I say that I know when a movie is going to kick ass. If you haven't embraced the attraction of this type of theater experience then I say this should be the time to do so. You may hate 3-D, IMAX, Zack Snyder, and hot chicks kicking ass... but to all that I say this: buy your tickets in advance, and right before you get there smoke a bowl and down a few shots of rum. That's sure to calm your superstitions, and if anything, it'll make the movie a shitload of a whole lot better. Not that it'll need it.


3 comments:

M. said...

Vanessa Hudgens is The Web's Most Wanted Vanessa!
(Check your score for your name too.)
More on Vanessa Hudgens.

Drunketh said...

What in the fuck!? Write me a poem while you're at it why don'tcha?

Drake Sigar said...

Nazis and Giant Demon Samurai wielding mini-guns in the same movie, it’s a dream come true.

My words are my own and as of posted from their creation forward I hereby claim originality to them. Pictures may prove to be promotional items and are the sole possessions of their respectful owners and/or companies. I do not sell, nor do I buy. I only rent, so therefore, nothing I own is truly mine.