December 18, 2012

Danielle Panabaker smells a bit fishy in Piranha DD (2012)

Man, and she looked like such a clean chick too. It really is a shame that she doesn't.... wait a minute... what in the hell is... Well that's why! Look. There's a huge ugly dead stinking fish right there between her legs. Duh. And all this time I thought that her pu... well, you know what, nevermind that thought, because I just now figured out just this second that I'd like nothing more in life nothing more at all than to be that dead blood-squirting fish right there. Man, what a sight for sore flies on pink velvet. 

I wonder what fish smell. Nobody ever thinks about that shit do they? Hang on, did she kill that fish by spreading her le... you know, it's been a while since I've seen the movie, and even then I was pretty drunk when it all went down river. So spread those legs and show me your eggs... uh, caviar... umm, you like seafood? *opens mouth* I got nothin' but these lame ass jokes. Sorry.

So this relatively hot babe has a Freddy-esque sequence where instead of a knifed glove,
a super-huge face-eating fish jumps out and gets her nose.

So totally scary. That second fish must have been of the Lesbian variety because what I'm about to say just didn't make any sense at all so let's get back to the hot fish on fish action while I re-contemplate my decisions of life: 1) I watched this movie, which was a horrible decision. OK. 2) Danielle Pan-a-baker looked pretty cute during the whole thing and I bet she probably looks really hot with black eyeliner running down her face. 3) Apparently she does: Check out that last screenshot. And 4) I got so much tarter, I don't gotta dip my fish sticks in shit! [Gotta miss Mitch Hedberg.]

"Hey! I got sloppy seconds on that fish filet baby."

No comments:

My words are my own and as of posted from their creation forward I hereby claim originality to them. Pictures may prove to be promotional items and are the sole possessions of their respectful owners and/or companies. I do not sell, nor do I buy. I only rent, so therefore, nothing I own is truly mine.