Stone Bottleworks 13th Anniversary Ale

Stone Bottleworks 13th Anniversary Ale (2012)

Limited Release (Brewed Once).

22 fl. oz. / $7.19 USD / 11.4% ABV

About: "Bottleworks, Seattle's legendary craft beer store captained by Matt Bonney and Matt "Vern" Vandenberghe, celebrated their 13th Anniversary in March of 2012. Since bottle shop owners can't make their own beer, "The Matts" commission a different brewery each year to help them create their anniversary brew. This time they wanted an especially big beer (they were aiming for 13% abv), so naturally they turned to us for help. Here you see the delicious fruits of our collective labor: a 13-grain, 13-hop imperial porter that packs a wallop. Cheers!

Funny enough, with all the specialty malts used, there were less fermentable sugars than anticipated, so it “only” got up to 11.4% abv, but we’re all still really happy with how the beer turned out. If for whatever reason, you’re upset that it’s not 13% abv, we suggest you take a sip, as it will immediately help you get over it. Hops: Bravo, Target, Columbus, Cascade, Delta, Warrior, Magnum, Apollo, Calypso, Perle, Galena, Chinook, Mt. Hood / Malts: Pale Two Row, White Wheat, Aromatic, Weyermann Chocolate Rye, Light Munich, Brown Crisp, Oats, Crisp Light Crystal, CaraMunich, Baird's Chocolate, Lightly Peated, Simpsons Dark Crystal, Crisp Amber."

Thoughts: Word of advice first off. Be careful when you pour this!

I tilted my glass and poured this brew out very gentle and slow when I got to the point where it looked as if a nice one and a half finger head had formed I set the glass down and it exploded all to hell on me!

Even with my gentle and cautious pour this beeer exploded once I set the glass down. The head furiuosly grew in less than a single second into an uproar and spilt over the top of my glass. The brew is dark brown during the pour and settles into a pitch black in the glass. The light brown kahki colored head that eventually settled down into a two finger showed no signs of going anywhere.

It pours like a Pub Ale with a Widget inside the can, and the forming head greatly resembles a Guiness pour. As I poured it I noticed it wasn't a smooth liquid, but had several clumpy bundles that fillled the glass with fun times to be had.

The smell on this one is pretty crazy. It stars out as a sweet almost barleywine type scent with dark fruits, the candy coated dried and sugared kind, plums and apricot mostly, maybe a little bit passion fruit and raisins, and a tingly boozy feel about it. Give it a few more whifs and some beautiful earthy hops start to mingle in. It smells strong and sweet, like a brandy... but doesn't go far from a recognizable strong ale. There's a heavy caramel candy tone to the whole thing, and luckily for me, it's light on the chocolate malt. After a while the scent of this brew reminds me of Southern Tier's OAT Imperial Stout. My stomach is growling.

Taste is a haze of grainy alcohol at first that starts to spike but slowly falls back before blinding. I'm getting a strong boozy caramel, very full flavored and followed by some grassy notes. It's very rich and flavorful. Nothing weak at all about this one. Pretty damn dense too. After getting used to the hops in the scent and the first few gulps, a roasted malt characteristic slightly takes over. It happened right when that puddle of foam left from the head right in the middle of the brew slid down my throat. Of course, the creeping hops are not far behind. There's a spicy tingle to each swallow followed by a cloudy haze that I can only describe as a state of exhaled joy. There's a high point to the sweetness in this one, but aside from that it's not really bitter at all or overly-sweet. It maintains well, even with that haze of booze and that sharp stabbing sickle of candy. It gets very peppery around the last gulp.

This is one sticky ass beer! Very syrupy and thick.

Overall this was a fun and interesting beer for me. I'd rank it pretty high, but I don't know if it would go on my favorites listing. The taste didn't blow me away or anything, but I'm tellin' ya, this beer was savory and just downright good. It's really hard to describe actually. Supposedly this is an "Imperial Porter", but it's got shades of Barleywine, Stouts and Smoked Ales. It really is an enigma of beer, but I'm not going to fault it for that. In fact, I think it's pretty damn cool. I must have experiecned about six different stages with this one and it made for a hell of a time. Especially on my empty stomach. Dinner has just been served.

Just scored some kick ass brews.

I've been looking for HoptimuM, not too long now, but for what seems like an eternity in my brain - to the point where even typing this now it feels as if I had been destined to do so. Then I find it not one minute away at the liquor store up the hill. Oh, somebody was trying to hide it quite well. Maybe until they could scrape enough dough to buy the other three from the four pack. But I'm the defective detective motherfucker and I sniff out then snuff out beers like this! In other words, I took it upon myself to buy that three pack and the four pack next to it, on the spot. All the while gloating over the imaginary gentleman that attempted to hide this treasure from me. The fuck you think you are Mr. Buy one bottle now and hide the rest!? For shame.

Alright, so what we got here from Right to Left is a Four Pack of Sierra Nevada HoptimuM, three more bottles and a bottle of Old Rasputin, Firestone's Sucaba Barrel-Aged Barley Wine and a four pack containing two more bottles of Old Rasputin (I drank the fourth bottle before checkout) and two bottles of Dogfish Head World Wide Stout. A beautiful sight, if I may say so myself. -_-

Three New Patches.

Check out these three new shoulder patches that I got.

Oh, and don't mind the other stuff! I just put that there.

Anne Hathaway smokes two joints in Havoc (2005)

She smoked a joint in the morning, then smoked a joint at night... Hey, I'm in a bit of a festive mood. I'm surrounded by beers and got some Chinese food and buffalo chicken wings waiting in the, uh... wings. Ahem. What's the occasion you ask? What the fuck you talking about I do this everyday. But according to my blogger stats, this is my 400th published post. Not that anyone, myself included, gives a shit. So let's celebrate with a BONE!

 Here's a few more pictures of Anne Hathaway from Havoc, having a few bones of her own. *wink*

What is it with that invisible joint gag that's going around?

How much you want to bet that James Franco taught her that shit!?

She proceeds to blow him out of range of the camera.

Once again, what is it with this girl and smoking invisible joints?!

I've really got to get some screenshots from Love and Other Drugs on here. Can't seem to recall why I didn't do it when I rented it a couple months ago. Huh, must have been sober or something.

Stone Imperial Russian Stout

Stone Imperial Russian Stout (2012)

Limited Yearly Release.

22 fl. oz. / $7.49 USD / 10.5% ABV

About: "Brewed in the authentic historical style of an Imperial Russian Stout, this beer is massive. Intensely aromatic (notes of anise, black currants, coffee, roastiness and alcohol) and heavy on the palate, this brew goes where few can - and fewer dare even try. The style originated from Czarist Russia's demand for ever thicker English stouts. Expect our version of this mysterious brew to pour like Siberian crude and taste even heavier! Malt bill: Pale Malt, Roasted Barley, Amber Malt, and Black Malt / Hops bill: Warrior."

Thoughts: This beer poured a super opaque dense black right out of the bottle and formed a thick, foamy milk chocolate colored head.

The scent comes off at first as mild chocolate and coffee. Both are noticeable, but they're laying very calmly. There's also a hint of black licorice.

The taste of this one is particularly interesting, exciting and what makes it special. Those chocolate and coffee notes start off naturally, but then there's this slow building of sweet syrupy like booze and warmth that comes in strong but doesn't go as far as to overpower anything. It falls back precisely at the right moment. Kind of stunning how it does so too as a matter of fact. It's got a sinister-like candy sweetness to it, and one of the things I'm finding that I really like about it, is that this beer doesn't abuse the mouth with massive amounts of chocolate or coffee. I was never a coffee drinker, and never really particularly a chocolate fiend, but whenever I would drink coffee it would have chocolate in it... suppose that's why I enjoy the mix as much as I possibly can.

Mouthfeel is velvety smooth and creamy, and just a tad fluffy from that foam that it's got, but it doesn't linger around. It's very easy going for a 10.5%.

As this beer begins to warm there's a creeping amount of grassy notes on the back of the tongue. It's a lighter to medium sensation and doesn't take anything away from the brew. I've got no problems with a hop tinge in a stout anyways. That syrupy black licorice starts to really come through just after about half way through the bottle, and a strange fruitiness starts to appear in various spots of scent and taste. The last few gulps of this brew it's got a lot of peppery tones. I found it enjoyable down to the very last drop. This is an awesome stout, I'm thinking about buying another bottle of this and mixing half of it with some Pumking later this year.

And I do believe that Uinta did their own take on this beer last year and called it Labyrinth Black Ale. Hmm.

The Tudors: Season 2 (2008)

This picture is hot!

During Season 1 of The Tudors, I wasn’t quite sure what to do in terms of finishing the rest of the series. I’m not really a quitter, yet I was unsure if it was going to get better. Not to say that the first season was bad, not at all… it was quite devilishly sexy, but also heavily political early on. Thus is the nature of the story and this program so I can’t really speak against it for that, but I wanted to get to the juicy bits. Naturally one cannot skip the first season and go straight for the second and undoubtedly best, since the first establishes characters and builds that overpowering lust our Lord has for Anne Boleyn. But once all the Wolsey drama is out of the way, it’s time for King Henry VIII to get Medieval on Anne’s sweet ass!

Thriving for complete and total domination on every level, Henry demands no less that everything he so desires… even if it means throwing a small tantrum every now and then. Such as the finale of Season 1 when he’s forced to pull out by His Lady - a moment where she knows that she’s most surely got him in her grasp. Using Henry’s desire not only for a gorgeous woman, but also his incessant yearning to have a son, this naturally makes him frantic and even with opposition at all angles, he will now stop at nothing. By any means necessary, even if he must appoint himself Head of the Church of England, banish his Queen from court, and piss off a Lot of people by pronouncing His law, the law.

Anne as fate would have it , gives birth to a daughter (she immediately apologizes, and Henry  most immediately goes out for some late night arse-snacking) and over the short course of time, she goes reasonably insane. Increasingly paranoid, stressed out to an unhealthy point of two miscarriages, and of course, bewitching as a uh, witch… it seems as if the King has fought so diligently to ‘legitimize’ his new marriage, their daughter and his right to free love, and For What!? Of course, we all know where this is… beheaded. Muahahaha!… sorry, couldn’t resist. What starts off as a slow simmering flame erupts in a smoldering blaze of passion, regrets and carnal violence!

My eyes were glued to the screen, and my hand, well, it was glued to something else. In the 2008 film, The Other Boleyn Girl, Anne was played by none other than Natalie Portman, and her sister Mary, by Scarlett Johansson. How anyone, King or otherwise, could drop Scarlett for Natalie is simply beyond me, and made the film a bit unrealistic. Natalie Dormer on the other hand, exemplifies the term enchanting beauty. Her face, her eyes and her neck (see picture above) are all sublime objects of lust and left me enthralled. I doubt any other portrayal of Anne Boleyn could be surpassed by her performance in this television series. On that same note, Eric Bana is no Jonathan Rhys Meyers. The awesomeness he has shown here, along with the supreme badassness he displayed in Match Point, has won me over.

While Seasons 1 and 3 (and subsequently Season 4 of this series) have been enjoyable, well made, well acted, very well designed, and have taken the most important factor of time to tell the story, the most tantalizing and indulgent bits of this tale were always engraved into Henry's second and new life. This could have easily become a shitty two-and-a-half hour movie starring two women and half a man which focused on only the good stuff. Oh wait! As for the TV Series, well, it went on a bit long for me. I would have preferred four films, one for each season, with the second film being an EPIC in length. Still, no matter how one feels about the film(s) already made or this series as a whole, the insanity between Natalie Dormer and JRM in this program was undeniably hot! If it was necessary to produce two extra seasons out of this to get the sexy parts documented, then I would say that it was well worth it.

Mixing Brews #1

Harpoon Leviathan Barleywine Style Ale "VS" Stone OAKED Arrogant Bastard Ale (2011/12)

WHAT'S GOIN' ON: Harpoon's Leviathan Barleywine Style Ale ($2.95) is an "English Barleywine" with a 10% ABV, hailing from Boston, Massachusetts... This vague as all hell interpretation of an English style ale features "a distinct malt backbone balanced by a unique blend of hops." She's keeping the mystery with her for a more interesting encounter perhaps. But what's this? Enter the self-proclaimed "Aggressive Bitch-Slappin" (not an exact quote) brew that throws "sex appeal" out the window and goes straight for the jugular! That time of the month other jugular, that is. Har har. Stone's OAKED Arrogant Bastard Ale ($3.55) is an "American Strong Ale" coming out of Escondido, California with an ABV of 7.2%, and features a true... Rapist's wit.

HOW IT WENT DOWN: These two beers formed to create a copper toned brew that is grainy as all fuck! During the pours its yellowish eggshell khaki colored head was growing all over the place. As I hold this big ass mug up to the light and above for a toast, I know that the shit has indeed, just got real.

The scent of this combination is utterly sweet and toasty... like fruity syrup dripping on heated wood, sizzling and wet. An abundance of barley malt come through first, and while the malt dominates for the most part, the hops appear to be crackling in the distance, like embers in a bonfire.

Though the taste goes through several small phases, it is bittersweet all around from beginning to end. But a very sweet bittersweet nonetheless. No sour or foul notes to be had. The two beers play off of each other, and seemingly duel it out on the taste buds at first. Try as it may, the candy like sweetness from the Leviathan becomes engulfed and injected upon by the grassy hops and oak chips from the Arrogant Bastard. It all blends together quite well however and in the end doesn't seem that these two brews are very far apart. As it warms more of the hops get their chance to shine through, and eventually leave this concoction with a medicinal taste almost like cough syrup.

The mouth feel is light, thin and frothy. It's a little bit sticky feeling, and coats evenly.

This merging of brews taste quite pleasant, if a bit underwhelming. Oak aging sometimes compromises a brews natural integrity, for better or worse, but it's always an entirely different monster. From what I've noticed in my limited experience with oak aged beers, it that the original formulas become a lot more mellowed out and subdued. Subdued... yet flavorful, interesting, and unique. This mix is far from a striking blow, but is still some quality stuff. I'd take it over NyQuil any day... wait a minute ...that gives me an idea.

Milla Jovovich... Stalked and Slashed!

Let's start off the way I usually like to do things and that's with this pretty lady putting make-up on in the bathroom mirror. Hmm. Just typing that out makes me feel like a weird motherfucker... but you know what? I kinda like that feeling.

I can't be alone in these feelings as I see movies all the time where a girl looks herself over and puts on make-up, pampers herself and shaves various places, or puts her hair up while topless... or even does some amateur cheerleader performances before going at it in a 69 on a stairway. What I'm saying is women are beautiful creatures meant to be stalked admired.

It's as if every little thing they do has a power of its own over me.

She's so pretty! She smells so good! And the way she blatantly ignores me...

It sure is frustrating being so powerless towards this object of my desire.

What's a man to do, in this day and age, to get a little attention from a girl he so doth admire!?

Something unspeakable, perhaps? Yes... oh, oh yes. Indeed.

I'd rather hold hands.

But I'm a hopeless romantic in that sense. Heh.

Milla Jovovich is having some trouble sleeping...

 

"I could be bounded in a nutshell, and count myself a king of infinite space, were it not that I have bad dreams."

Drowning. A common occurrence in the world of nightmares.

However...

Getting your throat slashed by a straight razor wielding faceless maniac in black leather gloves?

Not so much.