An Interview with Greg Lamberson.

[Note: In early 2007 after reviewing Greg Lamberson's films Slime City and Naked Fear on the now defunct Film-Talk boards, I posted a Director's thread for the man. To my surprise he found my notes (apparently at 3AM while surfing the web) and I took it upon myself to bug him with my questions. During the next few weeks, this is what came of it. I have re-arranged follow up questions and responses to fit in with the previous Q and A.]

Drunketh: Listening to your commentary on Naked Fear, you say that Undying Love is a lot more padded than NF. Obviously this isn't a gesture of disappointment, but I'm curious if you could expand on why you consider your second film to be the “best you've done”?

Greg Lamberson: I think that UNDYING LOVE has some actual atmosphere, and as the director, I take a lot of the credit for that. As I've already pointed out, SLIME CITY works because of SFX, music, art direction, acting (some of it anyway!), and my contributions as a writer and producer - but not my direction. UNDYING LOVE features most of my favorite scenes. It opens and closes with some pretty darned good bookend sequences that I'm proud of. I'm happy with the introductions of the various characters, the performance of Tommy Sweeney, and some in-your-face dialogue. I think the scene where the vampire chick goes down on our hero is pretty memorable as well. Of the 3 films, it turned out the closest to what I envisioned when I wrote the script. Also, although there is no nudity, the plot is driven by sex the same way that SLIME CITY was.

D: Speaking of Undying Love, If E.I. Cinema released the film on VHS, as well as your first and third film on DVD then my question would be: what is the holdup for this potential future release? On your website it states that there are no plans to release the Undying Love for DVD. I’d like to see a supervised transfer and commentary (it's already recorded right?), and basically the best release it could be.

GL: E.I. Cinema released UNDYING LOVE on VHS, re-released SLIME CITY on VHS, then released SLIME CITY and NAKED FEAR as a double feature DVD. They have the rights to release UNDYING LOVE on DVD as well, and Mike Raso and I have discussed doing so. I would supervise the transfer, we'd use my original title and the commentary that Tommy Sweeney and I recorded, a trailer, and it would be released as a double feature with another one of E.I.'s vampire flicks. There's nothing definite yet, but I'd say things look promising.

I actually recorded the commentary tracks for all 3 films around 2002 or 2003, before I left NYC. Since then, I've been able to watch the films on a pretty big screen here in Buffalo, as part of a mini-festival, and have had the opportunity to assess them collectively.

I think I shot 5 mins worth of additional scenes to UNDYING LOVE for running time reasons after finishing my first cut. They developed characterization, but didn't really advance the story. 3 scenes in total, and one of them was a reasonably sexy vampire seduction scene that I like quit a bit, that gave my villain a moment to shine. I shot at least 10 mins of additional material for NAKED FEAR after finishing my first cut of that; they turned out to be some of my favorite scenes in the film (partly because I shot them myself, and had a blast), but they totally changed my original concept of the picture. And while none of those scenes feel like padding, the dream sequence near the end of the film does feel like padding to me. There's a genuinely nightmarish feeling to it, I think, but there's no question that I was filling out the running time, especially since the dream comes 5 mins after what is essentially a music video depicting Camden escaping his apartment - I call this the ROCKY IV syndrome!

D: If E.I. is taking you in, then what are they going to do for you? Are they giving you money? Or simply making money off of you? The next feature from you, I'd like to see it on film. Since E.I. obviously supports low budget filmmakers, then why don't they save some cash up and get you do to something awesome. It irritates me actually, because I'd like to see you direct more.

GL: I have a good relationship with the E.I. people, and I'm sure they've made more money from me than I have from them, but they have zero interest in producing new films of mine. SLIME cost $50,000 to shoot on 16m; UNDYING LOVE cost $35,000, also on 16m; and NAKED FEAR cost $8,000, on Hi-8 video. E.I. finances their own productions, which tend to be silly sexploitation titles; I own my films. I would work as a director for hire for them, but they know I'm more interested in horror and subtext than nipples.

Roy is busy writing a screenplay which STREET TRASH director Jim Muro may direct for New Line Cinema, so he's not looking for money for DR right now. But he has such a good reputation in the genre that an investor has approached him, so there is a possibility that we will shoot this fall. I think this could be a breakout project for me; if not, it will definitely be a good film, which is what matters most.

As you know from my commentaries, Roy Frumkes - who wrote and produced STREET TRASH, directed DOCUMENT OF THE DEAD, and wrote THE SUBSTITUTE movies--was my film school production teacher. We've become pretty good friends these last few years, and we have similar views on indie filmmaking. When the screenwriter of DEADLY RITES and I decided to resurrect that project (we'd developed it before I left NYC), we agreed that we needed a real producer this time out, instead of using friends who had a few thousand $ to invest. DR is a very rich, very ambitious script. I'm thrilled that Roy has agreed to serve as Producer or Executive Producer. My plan is to shoot this one in Hi-Def, under the SAG Ultra Low Budget agreement, which requires a film to be made for $200,000 or less. At least half of that budget will go to cast (I don't want to say who right now), so film is out of the question. But it's going to look terrific.

D: Regarding your commentary... the things I most look forward to are the "eating out" and "brain painting" scenes. I hope you've got those hidden somewhere, because they sound great.

GL: Sorry, the "eating out" and "brain painting" scenes were never filmed, just discussed. 

D: A few other things: 1. I think the closet scene from NF is awesome. 2. Why Casablanca in the background? I mean, I heard the words... but really?

GL: Thanks for your comments on the NF closet scene. The credit for shooting the interior of the closet the way we did (with the actor standing against a piece of black paper behind him, in the middle of the living room, lit from beneath) goes to Ed Walloga, my Assistant Director. My personal favorite scenes are the murder of the burglar (the bloody crotch shot just may be the most horrifying image I've come up with); the 1-900-commercials, and any number of dialogue scenes between the two leads. I'm very happy with my direction in that one, especially since so much of it was on the fly.

The CASBLANCA and James Dean posters were already hanging in Ed's apartment, which we used for the film. I decided to leave them up because both served the homoerotic subtext of the film. Ed refuses to accept that there is a homoerotic subtext to CASABLANCA, but there is.

D: I'll admit the bloody crotch shot is well executed. Though rather sickening, it does add a lot... somehow. Heh! And yes, Casablanca is very that “thang.”

I think you've done great in your marketing. Whomever you get to do your artwork, they really pull it off. I've seen ads for your work in various magazines and in every one there's something that catches the eye. Your book's ad, for example, it goes to show that you've got people working for you that care. One of your major strengths is that you've got such interesting looking ideas…

GL: Yes, I've worked with some good artists, who taught me a thing or two about marketing. Eric Mache, who did the original SLIME CITY painting seen on the DVD, did a lot of my stuff, and graphic design is the strong suit of Mike Raso over at E.I. The cover for my novel (far and away the best thing I've done) was chosen by my publisher; the images are from paintings by Hieyronomous Bosch, a Medieval artist. Did you check out the DEADLY RITES art on my site? There's more on the way, but I'm real happy with what I have so far. A preliminary poster will be up soon (not the photographic flyer seen at the bottom - but Eric again).

D: Onto your Slime City commentary… I didn't quite enjoy it as much as Naked Fear's. But part of that is because it kept cutting out during select scenes (which is common), but NF just kept going and is more enjoyable. First off, I wish to say, that I am too a big fan of sex and violence. So I appreciate what you've done, even if they keep their clothes on while they do it.

GL: We actually recorded all 3 commentaries during a one-week period, while Robert was visiting from L.A. This was before I supervised the DVD transfer, so the SLIME CITY commentary was recorded to the VHS re-release--which was 8 minutes shorter than the original VHS release, and 4 mins shorter than the DVD cut. So someone at E.I. (now POPcinema) later had to edit the track, which is why it doesn't synch up perfectly. I had equal fun on all 3, just hanging out with old friends. The NF track was fun because we were drinking at my apartment. It cracks me up when I get a DVD delivery in the middle of the track, and then Craig Lindberg, my SFX man on UNDYING LOVE and NF, walks in.

D: Regarding the framing… it’s not as bad as you think. I actually don't see much of a problem with it. Every time you'd complain about it, I'm looking and I don't see anything wrong. Then again, the only thing I've ever directed is my ex-girlfriend bouncing around topless... but I wasn't at all distracted by any of the camera shots (I see the point on white wall backgrounds however).

GL: When I'm complaining about my framing on the SLIME CITY track, it's because we were watching a full frame VHS tape, which preserved the original 16m dimensions. I'm actually THRILLED with the framing achieved on the widescreen DVD. We originally framed for a 35mm blowup, which would have meant lopping off the top and bottom of each shot, but we never found a distributor to pay for the blowup (it would have doubled our budget). So the DVD actually looks the way we meant the final film to, and I'm happily satisfied.

D: Well that makes a lot of sense then, since you were watching the Unmatted Full Frame version. During this commentary I was just confused a bit. I thought for a moment that you are perhaps some insane perfectionist and no shot could please you... but I dismissed that bubble rather quickly, knowing that someone working with such a low budget has neither the time nor the money to do things that way and succeed as you did. So my second thought was that you're perhaps too hard on yourself...

Something that always get me laughing are the Boombox gags. Every single time... I guess it's universal, but they're just so precious. Are you really into rap or what? You and I are from completely different coasts, so whatever rap you know…

GL: I'm not into rap music at all. The big boom box was an actual part of life in NYC during the '80s. I like rock, some classical, some opera, some doo-wop, even... but not rap. There's a little bit of rap in each film, because it's part of pop culture in America. I like the rap songs in UNDYING LOVE and NAKED FEAR, but anything can grow on you. I actually like all of the music I've used: the score for SLIME gets a lot of attention, the one for NF is just insane, and the one for UNDYING LOVE is pretty unique.

D: During your commentary you mention that you shot on film, and then not shortly after people started shooting on video and one of the first (I guess) was a movie starring Tom Savini. You mistakenly referred to it as "New York Ripper" which is Lucio Fulci's film. The movie you're speaking of is actually "The Ripper". I agree with the people who say it's boring, it really is... really... but when the gore hits, it's off the charts.

GL: That's right, THE RIPPER! I hated it, but the filmmakers were ahead of their time.

D: You said, regarding the Seduction Cinema line of work, that you would rather "kill yourself first", then going the route of Lesbo-Vampires. While I am a fan of Seduction Cinema's work (I have a small collection and am not afraid to admit it), I do agree with you that you're above that… (However independent director Brian Paulin did director-for-hire work for them called Mummy Raider, and despite the abundance of softcore scenes they imposed on him, he really made it his own and it’s a solid work.) For you to even say that your films are padded out, try comparing yours to one of theirs and see how it comes up.

GL: I don't want to slam the Seduction Cinema stuff--because I can't bring myself to watch any of it! I did sit with Darien Cane at one of the conventions, though.

D: Speaking of padding though, I'd like to bring up someone: Misty Mundae (Erin Brown). I don't know if you have anything against the actresses from Seduction Cinema, but I figure Erin Brown would be perfect for one of your films. (I know you don't wish to name names dealing with your next movie).

GL: The basic concept of DEADLY RITES is that a Charles Manson-type escapes from prison, hooks up with his old followers, and carves up some woods at the same time that 2 cops and a priest are taking some inner city kids camping (cue the rap!). It's extremely brutal, but very thematic--DELIVERANCE meets HELTER SKELTER. I honestly think it has the potential to be pretty significant. Because the women in The Clan were killers back in '79, they're not exactly ingénues. I plan to have some real fun with the casting there. We have 2 younger females as well: a Hispanic police officer, and a character that would be perfect for Erin Brown. In fact, Erin Brown has been my first choice for the part since I met her at Chiller 9 months ago! So we'll just have to see on that one.

D: There are a lot of young talented actresses out there... Which sexy young woman would you most enjoy working for you?

GL: I'm not a fan of the whole Scream Queen scene. I did see a film called SKIN CRAWL, directed by Justin Weingrod, who works for EI. It starred Debbie Rochon, and I was pretty impressed with her performance. To me, Fay Wray and Elsa Lanchaster and Janet Leigh and Jaime Lee Curtis were Scream Queens. Now any actress flashes her breasts in a cheap-o horror film is called a Scream Queen, and entire films are built around them. I've had a few conversations with Brinke Stevens, and find her extremely friendly and intelligent. I'd like to work with her sometime.

D: Debbie Rochon is one of my favorite actresses. For a while there I was a bit obsessed with her actually. I mail order purchased a bust of her likeness, dressed up like a Goth Santa and went nuts with a garden tool this one time…

GL: I spoke to Debbie for a little while at Genghis Con is Pittsburgh last year, after the SKIN CRAWL screening. Very nice, very intelligent, very funny and, I get the impression, very tough.

D: Would you like to make your upcoming story "Johnny Gruesome" a film as well as a book? Has it crossed your mind or it that something completely separate?

GL: The JOHNNY GRUESOME page on my site is really nondescript, aside from that cool artwork. Here's the skinny: JG exists as a complete screenplay, and I'm 2/3 of the way through the novel. It was the second original screenplay I wrote, after SLIME CITY, and it's the one script of mine that is really scary. Unlike PERSONAL DEMONS, which would be too expensive to film (a William Morris agent looking for horror projects to rep to studios loved it, but said it would cost $100 million, and the studios only want to spend $20 mil on horror films), JG could be done in the $2 - $3 mil range. It's a small town horror story, with a murdered heavy metal teen coming back for revenge in the dead of winter. From a production standpoint, the biggest challenge is that the climax takes place on a frozen creek, which of course splits apart, and I'm not willing to compromise on that to get the film done. My hope is that I'll be able to finish the novel soon and place it with a publisher, promote it and DEADLY RITES at the same time, and then do JG as a film. Big plans, right?

D: I read on your site that Romero's "Martin" is one of your favorite films. Martin is actually my favorite film of his. Despite the popularity that Romero has gained with his living dead films, I find Martin to be his best work by far. It’s a film that really touched me, since I found that I had very much in common with it. It's a very disturbed and moody film, often times depressing.

GL: MARTIN is a classic. I feel sorry for people who have never seen it. I had an uncle who took me to see NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD when I was pretty young (because I begged him to), and then DAWN OF THE DEAD and MARTIN during their original releases. They had a huge impact on me. UNDYING LOVE is not in MARTIN's league, of course, but MARTIN did have a huge impact on it. I made UNDYING LOVE at the same time that my friend Larry Fessenden made HABIT--now those two are very similar in subject matter, although Larry had a bigger budget than me and took an artsier approach. While both of our films sat on a shelf looking for distribution, NADJA and THE ADDICTION came out and beat us to the punch. All 4 are NYC set, indie takes on vampirism. But the kid from Pittsburgh did it the best!

D: What exactly is your major dispute with Land of the Dead? I can understand how it doesn't live up to the other films, but why do you think so low of it? Do the rumors of bringing back the cast of the Land for a second installment prove true your hatred for the film? That Romero is seemingly giving in to the fact that he couldn't do it one time around? I know Romero is a hero of yours. So this must indeed be obviously troublesome. Perhaps he'll rectify it all?

GL: LAND OF THE DEAD sucked. The script was underdeveloped. The Toronto location blew as a stand in for Pittsburgh. It looked like a cheap (shot in Toronto) TV movie. Some of the characters were OK, but they never became real. The story made no sense: why would Leguizamo do these raids for money? How could money have any value in that world? It just didn't feel real to me, or brave, or dangerous, or scary. And the Dead Reckoning really blew! I know that Romero lost a big chunk of his budget, and the producers were jerks to him, and he walked off the set, but the most serious flaws in the film stem from his own lackluster script. Definitely not the film I waited 20 years to see. But I hope he gets another crack at it: I'd like to see Riley and Charlie again, and maybe George will write a better script this time.

D: I recently read on your blog that you've run into a bit of tough luck getting that deal with the investor on your Deadly Rites project in time, and that he's moved to another one. That really sucks dude. I know though that you're a determined guy, so I don't really need to tell you to stay determined... but know your fans are hoping that everything works out. If you've got to wait another year (and if it doesn't happen very soon, hopefully it happens during the season you wish), then keep on track with your other projects and get something done.

GL: I actually didn't expect to shoot DEADLY RITES until next year. It was a long shot that I'd be able to do it this fall. The potential investor didn't pass on the project, he never even knew about it; our producer Roy decided not to present it as a possible project until he saw the rewrite of the script... which is even better than the last version. Imagine DELIVERANCE meets THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE! So it's a bummer that they're making something else first, but that is, unfortunately, showbiz. Roy is still interested in the project, and there's still a slim chance it could happen this year. But it will happen: the script and concept art (much of which I haven’t posted yet) are that good.

D: Do you consider yourself a filmmaker first or a writer? We know you're both, but would you consider writing to be your true passion?

GL: Someone once asked Harlan Ellison what he wanted his tombstone to stay, and he answered, "Storyteller." That's how I feel. I've made 3 films (and worked on 7 others--2 incomplete and 1 never released) and only one novel, but the novel is the best thing I've done. I really can't choose one over the other. But I can always write a novel, and I can only make a movie if I raise money.

D: I see aside from scripts and Award Winning Novels you also do multiple "for hire" writing jobs, where your work goes for something like $63 an hour or so. Is this in fact your "real life job" or do you own a pub or something?

GL: I've been toying with a freelance writing job, but haven't really done anything with it. My rate is $65.00, which is the going rate for a copywriter. I've always managed movie theatres and video stores for a living; right now I'm the District Manager for Dipson Theatres, a locally owned chain in Buffalo. The best part of the job is that I program 1 or more midnight series a year. But it's too time-consuming now that I have a baby and it leaves me little time to chase my dreams. I recently switched to a part time schedule, which was working great, but now I'm full time again because we're short handed. The freelance writing would allow me more time to work on my other projects, except that the start-up time required is greater, and I just can't spare the minutes right now.

D: What is your attraction to the gore & shock / emotionally screwed up film genre? Is it something deep rooted and meaningful, or just rather simple and obvious... or both? Personally, I couldn't be happier that you've chosen that direction, since it's what I'm into.

I understand that with low to no budget films, doing something creative with splatter is a sure way to get a better (read: more marketable) product. Naked Fear isn't a "gore and shock" film, but instead relies heavily on emotions and feeling with a bit of grue thrown into the mix (ala History of Violence). So I'm wondering if you're heading into this direction, and at the same time hoping that you don't cut back the violent, obscene and sexual images.

GL: I don't know why horror gives me such a rush; it always has. We're freaks that way, aren't we? I like horror the same way I like violent crime stories; the good ones push the envelope of what we expect to see, and we can't look away.

D: A few months ago I took offense to a comment in a review written by Last Chance Lance in the 54'th issue of Rue Morgue magazine. Firstly, he begins the review by speaking of Tromaville, not that there's too much wrong with that. But to end his rant while talking about the disc features he writes that Naked Fear is a "lame extra". Way to drop the ball Lance. They give this guy all the straight to video “dirt jobs”, and usually they're put in his little one paragraph Last Rites section, but Slime City actually got its own "full" review in the Reissues section. Though Slime gets a decent review and mention, I feel he didn't give credit where it's due. [Dude, they make you watch the shittiest flicks of all time (like Shark attack 4, and Ghetto Voodoo - or whatever the hell), you should know better. Did you even watch it? For shame!]

GL: Last Chance Lance's review of SLIME CITY was actually a good one. I'm used to receiving backhanded compliments on the film, and as long as they're funny, I'm not offended. Like I said earlier, few people like each of my films equally; some think the extra feature is better than the main feature, and vice versa. When you make something for public consumption, you have to take your knocks. RM is a great mag; they've given me positive reviews for PERSONAL DEMONS and SLIME CITY, so I can't complain. But I will admit I was hoping for a review from the Gore-Met, because he's a big fan of the film.

D: I don't actually mind Last Chance Lance… in fact I was pleased to see that they actually gave him a place in the regular review section. I just think he mucked it up, that's all. And yes, your movie would have fit in better within the Gore-Met or Schizoid Cinema section.

GL: Troma... I worked on CLASS OF NUKE 'EM HIGH for a day, and that's how I met the costume designer/dance choreographer and SFX guys for SLIME CITY. I hate Troma. Lloyd Kaufman acts like a fool. I don't like the "let's be as stupid as possible and people will think we're funny!" cynicism. I can understand why people make the comparison, but there is nothing intentionally stupid about SLIME CITY. And at least I TRIED to make a good movie, which they never even attempt. The only thing they've done that I cared for was distribute COMBAT SHOCK. So I don't like the comparison, but I don't pay much attention to it, either; I suspect that reviewers who use that slant are only passingly familiar with Troma product.

D: Well I was a bit ticked when your film was compared to Troma. Maybe some people just see in that straight-line type configuration... not many people branch out with their mindsets, you know? "Weird gore, low budget... it's troma." I noticed the difference. I'm sure others will, despite what that dude in Canada said.

GL: I understand that Troma films have their charm and their fans. My complaints about the company, and Lloyd, have more to do with the way they exploit their crews and filmmakers.

D: You know a lot about low to no budget movies and I’m sure you know about other types as well. I'm wondering what a few of your favorites are. Any rarities?

GL: Some films I recommend: COMBAT SHOCK, DEADBEAT AT DAWN, OF UNKNOWN ORIGIN, DEATHDREAM, DEAD & BURIED, HORROR HOTEL, LET'S SCARE JESSICA TO DEATH, and THE DEADLY SPAWN. I'm working on a proposal for a book on making low budget horror films, and if I get a go ahead, I'll interview a bunch of low budget filmmakers.

SavageDragon77: Greg, I’d like to see that book on low budget filmmaking. I’m going through quasi-film school and you wouldn’t believe how many people frown upon horror. I’m not kidding. Everything is about comedy.

GL: Things haven't changed, Savage. One of the reasons I attended the School of Visual Arts in NYC was that all of the teachers were professional filmmakers, not academians; the other was that Roy Frumkes, who was famous mostly for directing DOCUMENT OF THE DEAD with an SVA crew, was one of those professionals. I had a lot of good teachers, with a lot of wildly different ideas about filmmaking--which is a good thing. But the one thing that united them was that, except for Roy, they shared mutual contempt for horror films.

Get ready for a lot of this. It's called artistic discrimination. Even though Hollywood is enjoying its biggest horror boom in years, even Hollywood hates horror; they want your money, but they don't want to spend more than $20 mil to get it (not that they should have to...). I recommend you dig up a book called SCARE TACTICS, by John Russo, who co-wrote NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, and has turned out crap ever since (he wrote the book that RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD is based on, but the movie has nothing to do with the novel). This book is the second best thing Russo ever did, and even though it was written with 16mm filmmakers in mind, before digital video existed, there is a lot of good advice in the book, including sample contracts.

For a more contemporary look, I recommend a book called SHOOT ME, co-written by Roy Frumkes and his then screenwriting partner, Rocco Simonelli. The book is structured around the making of THE SWEET LIFE, a romantic comedy starring James Lorinz (STREET TRASH, FRANKENHOOKER) and Joan Jett. The book is a look at Hi Definition indie filmmaking from the POV of two filmmakers used to working on film. Roy uses STREET TRASH and a never completed (but amazing!) film by Lorinz called SWIRLY, about a man made out of ice cream, as frequent examples in his text. It's a breezy book, with Roy and Rocco alternating chapters as screenwriter/producer and screenwriter/director.

I'll take this opportunity to plug a magazine I write a column called 'The Big Scream' for: POST MORTEM, from Nocturne Press. My first column appears in issue #4, due out this month, and is about mainstream horror films from the '70s (like LITTLE MURDERS and DEATH WISH and DELIVERANCE) that are more frightening than any horror films churned out by Hollywood today. The next column is "Political Horror," and the one after that is "Why Hollywood Hates You"--which is the connection I'm making now. It's a good mag, full of fiction, artwork, interviews, and articles.

D: Since you've been in the theatre business forever, mind to tell us about the movies you've seen on the big screen and how they've affected you? Batman? The Goonies?

GL: Here are the films I saw on the big screen that warped me forever: CONQUEST OF THE PLANET OF THE APES, THE 7% SOLUTION, LOGAN'S RUN, NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, DAWN OF THE DEAD, MARTIN, and STAR WARS. There are no substitutes. I have a bunch of younger friends, so I understand that GOONIES has a huge following, but I hated that shit! BATMAN was OK, but Batman should have been the main character, not Jack Nicholson as The Joker.

D: Surely there's an arcade section where you are or have managed before... so, have you dabbled? Are you addicted to video games by now any chance? I assume you would enjoy those Standing while shooting games… whatever that platform is called.

GL: In high school, I dabbled at DUNGEONS & DRAGONS. But I never took it seriously. I was there to sabotage my friends' fun. If a player missed a game, I killed his character so he'd have to start all over. If the Dungeon Master created a world for us to enter, and we found ourselves standing at a mysterious door, I was the one who'd say, "Let's go back!" I'd watch that same friend mesmerized at arcade games, and I thought, I'm not touching that drug! So I'm not a gamer at all. If I was, I'd never get anything done. I'd rather read a book or watch a movie. But most of my friends, and many of my family members, are video game junkies, so I see the devotion required. I do feature a "standing and shooting" game in JOHNNY GRUESOME.

D: How much popcorn do you consume on a regular basis?

GL: After 12 years in the theatre biz, the rotting stench of popcorn makes me sick to my gizzard.

D: What are your thoughts and opinions on the state of televised no limit Texas Hold-Em poker tournaments? If you're not into poker, just switch that with Pool or Darts.

GL: I'm not into poker, pool, or darts!

D: If you're not into poker, pool or darts (which confuses me), how about bowling, pride fighting or hot dog eating contests? Personally I don't think that those involved should be allowed to dip their bread in water… that's weak. As for bowling, candlepin should be outlawed. And pride fighting? They stop the fights too early. What's your opinion?

GL: …

D: Garbage Pail Kids, the cards from back in the day… What's your view?

GL: I'm too old for the Garbage Pail kids, but I believe that Scott Coulter, the SFX man on SLIME CITY, did the SFX on the crappy movie version. The only cards I ever collected were for the PLANET OF THE APES TV series.

D: You must have a pretty cool looking yard right? Have you put work into it to make the landscaping your own? If you don't have a yard, then have you considered moving to a place with a big backyard where you can BBQ and walk about nude to your desire?

GL: I have a backyard, a fence, and a grill, but not the degree of privacy conducive to nude frolicking...

D: To me a backyard surrounded by a tall fence is like a sanctuary. One where I can go out at dim-night, grill some rib-eyes, blast some Danzig, and drink a couple 40s. It's something sacred actually. Where I'm at now I don't have a yard like back home... which is awful. And I miss my mum too.

GL: My own mother was a big influence on me, she died 4 years ago, and I definitely miss her. She did that cool oil painting of the Phantom of the Opera on my website.

D: You tend to visit many conventions. Can you tell me or us about the weirdest experience that you've had at one of these nerd-fests?

GL: Believe it or not, I actually haven't had ANY weird experiences at these cons. Oh, you find yourself surrounded by eccentrics, but it would be dull otherwise. Harlan Ellison got stuck in an elevator for 30 mins at World Horror Con, which was funny... and Ted Raimi spent the entire Twisted Nightmare Weekend trashed and away from his table, which was embarrassing. And at that same con, a disgruntled baseball team--angry that they lost their championship--fanned out through the hotel, beating up any "horror faggots" they could find (I slept through the whole thing, but the team was locked up), but that's about it. I usually sit at my own table with my wife, or at the E.I. Cinema (now POP Cinema) table with those folks, so I tend to have a mellow time talking to them and a couple dozen or so fans about movies.

D: What about the Sexiest?

GL: Sexiest time: like I said, I sit with my wife! And we sat with Darien Cane at one show, and I met Karen Allen, my favorite actress, at another. I never attended a con, as a guest, while I was a swinging single, so I have no tales of drunken debauchery, drugs, or orgies with scream queens. I think my favorite show last year was Horrorfind in Baltimore. Roy Frumkes was there, promoting the STREET TRASH DVD a few months after I had him screen a 35mm print of the film at the theatre I used to manage; a bunch of my fellow horror writers were there, like John MaClay, Brian Keene, Steve Wedel, and Edward Holsclaw, and some of the biggest SLIME fans I've met in my life.

Kate had a comment on conventions that I unfortunately lost… yet somehow Greg’s response still got copied into my file:

GL: Years ago, I used to attend the Chiller Theatre Show in NJ, but my friends and I bailed after only a few hours each time. I don't really enjoy huge crowds, overpriced merchandise, or "celebrities" charging for autographs (last year at the Canadian Expo, which included Rue Morgue's Festival of Fear, Elijah Wood and James Marsters were each charging $80 per autograph!). And I hate standing on line (I don't think you mentioned how insane the wait to see Bruce Campbell was). But it's a whole different story when you're a guest / dealer. I'm no good at hucksterism; I don't like trying to "sell" my work or myself. Not my style. But I'm happy to sit at the E.I. table, have E.I. reps push SLIME CITY and offer to have me sign it (for free, of course; I could NEVER charge someone for an autograph), chat up the person, and if they seem interested, recommend my book.

Horrorfind is one of the few cons to pay any attention to authors, and they set up non-stop readings in 2-3 different rooms; you could literally spend an entire day listening to authors read their work, and not have to shell out a cent. For me, this was a great opportunity to meet a lot of fellow writers I knew only from the Horror Writers Association message board. As a guest, I was invited to the Big Private Party, where such luminaries as Angus Scrimm, Reggie Bannister, Ken Foree, Tom Savini, etc. gathered in a more relaxed and Fanboy-free atmosphere. After that, a few of us writers and our better halves relocated to our own hotel room party and had a great time. Regarding Fanboys: we all have our stories, and make our jokes, but when I'm selling a DVD of SLIME CITY, and a guy comes over to me with a beat up old VHS copy of the film, tells me he loves it, and asks me to take a picture with him, he makes my day. I'm no celebrity, I'm not famous, and I'm grateful for anyone who appreciates the flick. This year, I'm only attending 2 cons for sure: FOF again, and the Eerie Horror Film Festival, and possibly Screamfest in Florida, but next year I plan to do Horrorfind again if I'm free.

RE: the bootlegs, I don't condone them, but most bootlegs are of movies / TV shows not available yet, and I can understand a diehard fan shelling out too much money for something they're dying to own. I've done it myself--and almost every time I've done so, the announcement for the official, extras-jammed legit edition was right around the corner!

[That's splat.]

[Since this interview, Greg did indeed go on to work with Erin Brown in 2007 (in the Johnny Gruesome short film / music video) and Debbie Rochon in 2009 (in his sequel to Slime City, appropriately titled Slime City Massacre, which has just been completed and is making rounds in the festival circuit now). Also, Shock-O-Rama (a sub label of I.E.) went all out and finally released Undying Love, along with the Gruesome short and Slime City / Naked Fear in the Slime City Grindhouse Collection Set. Not only that, but Greg did go on to write his book on low budget filmmakers, entitled Cheap Scares. Right on Greg!]

For up to date news, and journal postings, visit Greg’s website: Slime Guy: The Gregory Lamberson Files.

February 1st, 2010, Bearded Weirdo Reviews did an interview with Greg. Definitely CHECK IT OUT as it’s got pretty much all of the new stuff he’s been doing and it gets really in depth.

Gregory Lamberson's Naked Fear (1999)

Naked Fear is a 1999 film by the always humorous and talented independent director Greg Lamberson. It brings together the main leads from his previous two films, Robert Sabin (of Slime City) and Tommy Sweeny (of Undying Love), to create an intertwined movie existence with an opposing tension unlike any other.

OMINOUS MUSIC blares during the credits as we're taken past the dreaded laundry room and up the stairs of what seems to be a high rise apartment building. Mom and Pop are all dressed up and ready to paint the town... red that is. Knowing that of course in films like this, yuppies never do seem to make it to their 'little soirées', at least without a bit of trouble coming their way. Trouble in the form of a black Jack Napier, as it would be. The dark skinned fellow hiding around the corner lunges forth with gun in hand and demands they hand over the cash. Even though they're all too willing to do so, shots ring out and pops is out of commission, much to the dismay of his wife who begins screaming at the top of her lungs. A single bullet to the forehead takes care of that however, as our villain for the time being spouts a catchy little number that goes a little something like this: "Try screaming now, bitch." Our young soon to be hero opens the door to find his parents laying there dead. The evil man looks down upon him and with grin on face says something or other about the devil in a pale moonlight. [Actually, he ran off.]

Fast-forward something like thirty years later and cue the 'you knew it was coming' nightmare as Camden (Robert Sabin) awakens in a cold sweat, again. He does what he normally must in this situation and starts to lift weights! He's working out, sweating like a prison inmate, looking at the picture of his dead parents on the table in front of him and getting flashbacks of their deaths. This shit is getting intense!! His eyes bulging, you can tell there's a fury inside of him... but wherever it is inside, it must be pretty deep.

See, Camden has (as we come to find out) agoraphobia, which is a rare condition where a person develops a split personality, dresses up as a bat and furiously pleases himself to late night 1-900 commercials on the tube. Actually, Camden never leaves his home. His whole life since his parent's deaths, he's been taken care of by his (their?) lawyer / adoptive protector Donald, and raised on their trust funds. He has his food and groceries delivered to him by the same Asian guy each week (who he has come to trust) and the third and only other person he lets into his apartment is the super (who seems to have an obsessive compulsive desire to change batteries in the smoke detectors every three god damn days).

He goes to the door one day to get his groceries, and through the peephole he finds not his regular guy, but instead some scraggly looking dude in a black bandanna. He opens the door slowly and cue the OMINOUS MUSIC. This metal-head doesn't seem the most trustworthy guy on the job, as he doesn't stay outside the door as directed while Cam goes to get his money, but instead comes in and proceeds to f'n case the joint. Here we get a great scene of acting on Sabin's part as when he comes back and finds the guy in his apartment, he closes his robe with a displeased and puzzled look on his face - classic. Is this just another one of those daily things that agoraphobics go through, or it is something more?

We're introduced now to one of Cam's favorite pastimes: Watching from his telescope down at the prostitute in front of the theater, her pimp standing not too far behind as she offers tricks to turn. Those wacky New Yorkers sure do crack him up.

Lawyer Donald comes by the house on one of his regular visits, and greets Cam with a stack of magazines. "You must be on every mailing list in the state. Is there anything you don't read?"

"Yeah, street signs." he responds with a giggle. They sit down and have a chat about how things are going. Donald thinks that Cam needs to finally get out, or maybe start seeing a head doctor. But Cam has other plans, he wants.... a Roommate! Hey, it's a step. They come to an agreement and Cam will be the one doing the screening. After going through a few of New York's finest and brightest (right), he finally meets the man of his, err, roommate of his dreams: Randy (Tommy Sweeny). This scary looking fellow (below, right).

The interviewing portion of the meet and greet doesn't seem to last too long as Randy tells Camden that he's an Orphan. Which of course, upon hearing the news, Cam's eyes light up. The sooner he can move in, the better.

This is the point where we hit that magical interlude when Randy is shown to us and not the film's protagonist as the evil being he truly is. He makes his way back to the place where he was squatting with (who you'll recognize as) the metal-head grocery delivery guy(!) and some drugged up girl who's kept around for kicks. Or at least, that's what Randy thought, before he gets into a minor squabble. As she's told to go powder her nose, Randy exclaims that he is displeased with having her around, but metal-head isn't having any part of it. The girl stays, and they're going to carry out their nefarious plan to completely hallow out Camden's apartment. "The guy's a total shut-in. There's no way we're getting him out of there." Randy says. Metal-head is up for suggestion and Randy devises a plan so ingenious, so diabolikal that it would make the freakin' Riddler blush... he's gonna get Cam wasted, get him laid and build up the guy's confidence. It's brilliant, man!

So begineth the male bonding! They're sitting on the couch when another one of those creatively made 1-900 number commercials comes on the tube. "You ever call one of those things?" Randy asks. "All the time..." "Camden, you ever get laid?" There's an awkward silence. "I came close once, in high school.. then my parents died and it didn't work out." They share a bit from that moment on, talking about their parents, and of course, chicks...

"Chicks are great, as long as you keep 'em in line. But friends are forever."

Pretty soon you'll start to notice a bit of a trend concerning Randy. He never lets something as menial as a chick come between a friendship. Later in the middle of the night, Camden awakes to strange noises, only to find the window shades crackling in the wind. When he closes the window and turns around, grocery delivery guy pulls a gun and the planned robbery is in full effect. Well, at least it would have been, if not for Randy, who jumps out from the shadows and stabs his former partner in crime to death.

This brings us to the single best bloodied underwear shot in cinematic history! Move over Schramm, Naked Fear got your number and just gave it to every single automatic dialer in town.

"He was gonna... kill me. Huh. If you'd moved in one day later I'd be dead now." Camden has a new savior and now they're best friends till the end. But what in the hell are they going to do with this dead body? Randy hates cops, of course, but Cam can't at all get his beauty sleep with a corpse in the middle of the living room. So they wrap him up in a carpet and Randy tells Cam that everything is going to be fine. He grabs a bottle of pills, pours a few into his disgusting looking blood covered hand and offers Camden a few.. which of course, he takes. [The audio commentary has a blast during this particular moment, as it is so absurd: "Don't worry that these pills are covered in blood. I'm sure the guy who I killed is clean."]

So Randy takes care of things there, and decides to get some unfinished business done. First on the top of his list, head to the local cinema to buy cocaine for the young lass back home waiting. Of course, this is no regular drug as he heads off to the bathroom to mix rat poison into it. Suddenly, two strapping young lads(arm in arm) come busting in. "Get the fuck out of here!" yells Randy and they take off. [Another hilarious audio commentary moment: "We'll just go to the ladies room instead." ... "Yeah, they're not mixing rat poison and coke in the ladies room."] So one former friend and his girl are snuffed at the hands of our anti-hero. Now it's off to make good with his new buddy Camden, what better than a present to tide things over?

All the while Camden is trying to expand his social life, by of course calling up more of those naughty 1-900 numbers. He starts talking with a girl, but this time he makes a rainbow connection, decides to come clean and tells her who he really is. They're both unsure but he tells her his number, and surprisingly she calls him back. He's all smiles at this point and heads to bed happy. That's when Randy returns with his gift: A hooker with a heart of gold, who (finally, in one of Lamberson's films), gets naked. Alright.

Of course later when Randy asks how it went, Camden says that they talked for a while and well, he couldn't exactly rise to the occasion. Was it nervousness from being a virgin? Is he in love with the girl on the phone and that distracted him? Is it... something else? In any case, Camden's got a real date with Julie (Peggy Crow), and asks Randy to go out for the night. And Randy goes out alright... out for Revenge!

[After all, he payed her to sex him up, not talk his ear off.]

Julie, a former telemarketer and as we come to find out, rape victim, isn't all too comfortable with closeness, but she takes a chance by meeting Camden in his home. They chat for a while, share an ale together, and dance for a short bit before Cam goes in for a kiss and she has a bit of a freak-out. She leaves the apartment and Camden in despair, though later Randy comforts him saying "Maybe she's damaged goods. I wouldn't let it get you down."

Later, while watching the news, Camden is horrified to hear that the hooker he was with just the other night was found whorribly murdered. He gets up and runs to the telescope, only to see the pimp looking rather pissed off and staring back.

Camden: "Gloria's dead!"

Randy: "Who?"

Camden: "The PROSTITUTE you brought me the other night!"

Randy tells Camden that everything is going to be OK, the pimp doesn't even know him, and there's nothing to worry about. Cam accepts this and they go on with their lives. Julie calls up Camden later and apologizes for rushing off like that. They both meet up again and discuss their lives. Both of them have personal demons they want to get past, and perhaps they can do that together.

While walking her to the door, Randy comes home suddenly and startles her. They shake hands, and Randy is less than willing to let go, considering he is rather creepish.

So where was Randy all that time? Oh right, off murdering the pimp. When Camden catches the news and once again hears the late breaking story he's in freak out land, baby! Running to his trusty telescope he finds nothing now but a brick wall. Randy approaches him from behind and asks what he's looking at. Cue OMINOUS MUSIC. By this time Camden is becoming increasingly paranoid and scared, so the next day he calls up his lawyer pal to come over and escort Randy out of the apartment. Randy is naturally not too fond of the idea and lays waste to the lawyer friend with ease. Camden does what he does best and locks himself in his room, cowering in the corner, while Randy softly explains himself. "I'm not psychotic. Look who I killed.. a whore, a pimp and a lawyer. They're all parasites."

"You wanted a best friend. Well you got one for life. And I'm not going anywhere. You don't understand the responsibilities that go with friendship. You never dump a friend for a chick. Never." Camden isn't budging and Randy isn't leaving. After all, they're friends and why would Randy desert his best friend in his darkest hour? Randy even goes the extra mile and cooks a meal for him, only to leave it outside his door. But later in the night when Randy is suffering from nightmares of his parent's abuse, Camden wakes up to find him sitting on his bed, smoking a cigarette (or was that twenty of them?). This is where we learn the truly awful fate of Randy's parents. He killed them!

The nightmares were undoubtedly caused by the upcoming anniversary of his parent's uhh, death I'm pretty sure. To commemorate the occasion, Randy heads out to the local cemetery / town square and proceeds to urinate on his parent's graves. While doing this, Cam is back at home going through Randy's things. Inside the pages of the book Helter Skelter, he finds Shocking Evidence(!) as to who Randy truly is. But before he even has time to rationalize things, Randy comes to the door, pounding on it until the chain lock busts off. By this time Camden is hiding in the strangest choice of places.

"Nice try Cam.. But I think it's time for you to come out of the closet."

And he does, with a staple gun and a vengeance!

Stuffing Randy in the closet and nailing it shut, ("It's like a coffin in here man.. Let me out.. I promise I'll be good.") Camden is now filled with the confidence he always needed and decides to leave his apartment for the very first time since the death of his parents. Randy screams as he's leaving "I got you your first blowjob, don't let her come between us.", but that doesn't stop him. Camden is finally out... of the apartment that is, and it's rockin' walkin' good time as he heads off, with nothing but his bag, to find his lady love.

FIN.

Or is it? Not really.

Well, I'll spoil the rest of it for you. Here's a bit of the dialogue, when Randy comes back for revenge and gives Camden the ultimatum only a true psycho could: "Rape this bitch or I'll paint the walls with her blood! Do it or I'll put a bullet through her head and fuck the hole..." Of course you know what happens next... surprise ending. But this ain't no Casablanca, baby... you know Randy is going to take a dive and Camden is going to get the girl. Right?

After watching Slime City I was left in awe as to how awesome it was. The next day I watched Naked Fear, and to my surprise, I may have actually liked the second film better. Which confused me a bit, since it's not nearly as gory or gross (though, yes, there are some gory and quite disgusting moments in Naked Fear), and it's more of a psychological genre entry. Not nearly as staight up outlandish as Slime, but all the while very uncomfortable, entertaining and well made. For some reason, its existance is hardly listed on the DVD package. The front of the cover does state that it is a double feature, but the back just blends the title in with the extras. A shame, as Naked Fear stands alone as a title to be owned and shouldn't have to take a backseat to Slime. Then again, Slime does have that amazing cover art so I can see why it was done this way. Still, these are two very different films, so don't go comparing the two of them too much. Try Naked Fear out for yourself sometime, when you're not in the mood to be slimed.

Naked Fear can be found in the extras for Lamberson's first film Slime City, which is released on the Retro Shock-O-Rama label. The film was shot on video (unlike Slime City which was shot on Film and is presented anamorphic) and is presented in its original aspect ratio of 1:33:1. Those who like their aspect ratios incorrect, when streched to 16x9 the picture doesn't look too bad, actually. There seems to be a slight video line across the bottom of the picture, but it's not distracting at all. Especially considering the film really draws you in. Both films are Progressive and look very good. Naked Fear (as well as Slime City) features an audio commentary by the director and stars. Lamberson and Co. are extremely funny during their chat sessions and give lots of fun information the whole way through. There are many moments of intersting vague comments dealing with male bonding, telephone cords being straight, being married w/ children, and quite a few in jokes that make you wonder....

Also, as a side note before I end, this is the first and only movie that I've seen where the final credits show a montage of funny outtakes, while a very offensive rap track plays over the whole thing. Greatness.

It comes highly recommended.

Gregory Lamberson's Slime City (1988)

Starring: Robert C. Sabin & Mary Huner

Directed by: Gregory Lamberson

"I'm not uh, messing up the sheets anymore... I can't speak for Greg." Welcome to Slime City, a rundown freaky place where the Street Trash runs rampant and Plutonium Babies are born by the dozen... where you don't need to have Brain Damage to live there, but it may help if you're a Teenage Zombie. Let's take a stroll down memory lane, and take a look at a Cult Classic film which has been unfortunately overlooked, but is making a comeback in a big-ass, gruesome way! Variety calls Slime City "REPULSIVE"... But I call it home.

A slow pan down a red bricked building reveals a lovely aged woman with glasses, either named Bunny or Ruby depending on who you ask, sitting in a gated area resembling a front yard (If you could even call that a yard, it's more like a sunbathing area on concrete.) We're introduced to our hero Alex (played by the low key master of the messy bed sheets himself Robert C. Sabin!) and his significant other, Plain-Jane wholesome Lori (not to be confused with gothy mistress Nicole, Mary Huner) as they're out hunting down an apartment for the young lad. The two of them have already looked at one other place, with cockroaches in the refrigerator no less, so second time's the charm and Alex decides to take it. Rather quickly I might add too. The OMINOUS MUSIC playing would suggest that there's something strange about this place, something spooky and mysterious. It’s the kind of place where if you move a bookshelf or two you could find yourself in a secret living room or something.

With the "help" of his friend Jerry, Alex lugs a stained mattress up the stairs to his new pad. Jerry is sad because Alex is leaving him behind, and thinks he's just doing it for the chicks, man. But no way, not Alex, as he explains, "This place is strictly a retirement city." Suddenly, out of the door across the hall, emerges Nicole. In heavy neon blue make up, bondage attire and a fluffy black wig, it's obvious that things just got a little more interesting. Despite looking eerily familiar, Alex introduces himself to her while his "style cramping" buddy seemingly rubs his crotch in a circular motion while drooling all over himself. This dude must not have gotten it in about, well forever, as he starts whining about becoming Alex's roommate. Clingy much? It's a good thing you're getting away Alex, because by the looks of it, this guy wants to cramp more than your "style"... if you know what I mean.

Cut to Alex and Lori together inside the now set up apartment. Lori says that her parents want to meet Alex, but that doesn't sit too well with him, as you can see, because he's a rebel who likes to draw portraits. And he also desperately wants to have sex with her, but of course she's not ready. They passionately kiss and she pulls away, telling him that she needs more time. "You said that once I got my own place..." spews from Alex's mouth and now we realize that she's a master manipulator, taking advantage of the supply and demand of sexual relations. They bicker for a moment or two before leaving together.

Heading down the stairs the two of them run into Roman, or should I say that Roman runs into them. Seeing as he was hiding around the corner awaiting the two, in a most creepishly fashion. A leather jacket clad, young fascinating poetry loving gothboy who's been to one too many Misfits shows, Roman goes on about artists not getting the respect they deserve until they're dead. How true. But Alex and his prudish young lass are in a rush, so they leave Roman all to his loathsome lonesome.

Coming back that night, Alex runs into Nicole once again and she inquires about Lori, whom she saw him with. "She looks like a nice girl." Nicole says while some stoned out of his gourd piece of manmeat sways to and fro.

"She is." he responds.

"Too bad."

Leaving Alex with an unhappy look on his face, Nicole drags said nameless stoner into her place and not two seconds after she's in her apartment starts moaning in quite a sexual manner. As we cut to the first of thirteen scheduled Robert Sabin Speedo shots, we see him tossing and turning trying to get some rest while the moans continue through the night. Suddenly, blood curdling screams ring out! End Speedo scene.

The next morning Alex comes downstairs to find Roman roamin' through the garbage for any good stuff he can find. Wondering what the hell he's doing, Alex inquires, which leads Roman to invite him over for some "nourishment" later on. For some reason or another, Alex sort of agrees to the proposition. (Now, I don't know about you. But if I ever find someone digging through the trash bins and then that person invites me over for food and drink, I pass on it. New neighbor or not, it's just common sense. But of course Alex isn't exactly thinking straight lately, what with his girlfriend not giving up the goods and all!)

Now Alex and Jerry are sitting together on a bench, which I'm guessing is located outside of their College, not High school. Jerry goes on and on about "blowing hard", though he's talking about nose, I'm beginning to suspect that this dude blows a little more than that. They discuss their female problems, which when you put these two guys together, there are plenty! But enough of that. This is the point of the film where we find out that Alex works at none other than Galaxy Video! Talk about a cush job huh, Assistant Manager of an old mom and pop video shop where he gets to watch porno and horror movies all night and get paid for it. That's gravy, baby. Lori pays him a visit and when Alex invites her over for the night, she blows him off, much to his dismay. So that night Alex decides to take Roman up on his offer, and stops by his place for some Himalayan Yogurt and three-hundred year old Moonshine.

Roman: "I guess I should have warned you that I don't eat meat."

Alex: "That's ok, my mind is open to new experiences."

As Roman pours the wine, he tells Alex that he stopped doing LSD after he got his first hit of the wet stuff. I guess it's that intense, but personally I wouldn't just stop doing Acid because something stronger came along. Nothing wrong with mixing toxins that's what I always say. Am I right or what? Oh, and did I mention that this Roman dude is something like ninety pounds soaking wet holding two fifteen pound freeweights? If I were Alex I wouldn't be the least freakin' bit surprised to find out that he doesn't eat meat. Hell, I'm surprised that the f'n guy even eats at all, considering the only thing he's going to find downstairs in the garbage cans are hacked up body parts from one of Nicole's boytoy victims.. and sorry Roman, but that just happens to also be meat. Moving on.

Now that Alex has his buzz on, Nicole is ready and waiting for him. She invites him inside and they begin to passionately kiss, as she lays him down on a leather sex padding of some sort. She undoes a panty strap and the two of them, in grand fashion, engage in FULLY CLOTHED SEX!! Yes, the age old act of unzip, lift the skirt and go which was made oh-so famous in automobiles during the 1970's, is also practiced quite often in dingy, gothed out apartments. Fully Clothed Sex, the true alternative to semi clothed sex, and if you're shy, it's even better than the real thing. Yes, that's right, Fully Clothed Sex, the only cool way to have sex. I guess Nicole is a one minute quitter, since she hits her climax in no time whatsoever (way to go Alex, you stud you), but then suddenly begins screaming the name Zachary. (What the... fuck?!) Which in turn sends Alex into a dream sequence (he dreams in black and white, which is the only cool way to dream) where he confronts a strange dude in a black mass shroud who feeds him more of that strange wine. The glass drops and crashes to the floor, causing Alex to jump awake.

Only one thing is amiss: He's covered in SLIME! Gooey, nasty, sticky slime and it’s covering his entire body. Speedo still in tact thank the dark lord, but slimey nonetheless. Not at all vain, he gets up and runs to the mirror. Next thing you know he's walking down the street when he's accosted by a homeless man wanting a quarter or two. Like any normal slime covered dude, he's aghast and upset even at being inconvenienced like this. Though he does throw some change onto the sidewalk, so at least we know he cares. But Alex has even more to care about now since the slime oozing from his pours is increasing and he's becoming liberally covered in the thick, green goo. Caking his face and making him sick, he crawls down an alleyway and begins to vomit up gray mush.

Now there's a time in every man's life where he has to make a decision. What's the right thing to do, and if I end up doing the wrong thing, what can I do to protect myself. That is the thought that should run through your mind before you end up fucking the gothy slut next door. Of course, if you're messed up on occultist voodoo moonshine which makes Acid seem like a six pack of O'Doul's, then that's probably not going to happen. See, that's exactly the sort of thing that can hinder a man's reasoning skills and make him forget that he: 1) already has a girlfriend, 2) doesn't own a condom, C) heard blood curdling screams in that apartment, ect. Now you wake up covered in slime, your wang may or may not drip off the bone, and you've got to face it pal that you're up shit creek. You could spend the rest of your short miserable life in despair and regret... OR...

You could go on a f'n rampage and kill that bum who bothered you earlier. Which is exactly what Alex does… Alright Alex! Upon succumbing to his murderous insanity filled rage, the slime all but disappears from his flesh. What a startling revelation. What the hell does it mean though? Is he going nuts, or is there something truly wrong with his body and soul. He washes up when there's a knock at the door. It's Roman, looking heroin chic in his all black atire, tanktop, tight jeans and devilock hairstyle, and he's brought Alex some leftovers from the other night. Alex seems worried and asks him, "Listen, has that stuff ever made you hallucinate, or do anything strange?" "Sure," Roman tells him, "all the time, that's what's so great about it!" How can you not like this guy? Lori calls him up and invites him to dinner with her parents. Alex is hesitant but agrees, as usual, that seems like the kind of guy he is. And after that the thought of food must have gotten to him, since he begins to chow down on more of that nasty Himalayan Yogurt (The Frogurt is also cursed!). Of course with that running through his bloodstream now he heads over to Nicole's apartment and raids her fridge for some of that tasty wine. Chugging it like an addict to the dark arts, the sense of dread looms over Alex.

While out and about, Lori is confronted by a strange fortune telling woman who scares the crap out of her with her inane wordings, "You're in trouble. Terrible trouble.. I can tell. No, not you. Someone else, close to you perhaps. Your lover?" Obviously she knows what she's talking about. Come to my parlor and we'll talk, she says. A dollar is a small price to pay for a soul, she says. Real slick, for the "you're all doomed!" character at least, though she should probably work on her skills a bit. Meanwhile back at ye ol' haunted apartment structure, Alex is being led down to the basement by resident landlady Ruby. She holds out her arms, showcasing two shelves full of wine bottles and says, "Here it is, the legacy of Zachary." Looks like a pretty weak "legacy" to me. A few wine bottles, some jars of goo and a couple books? And speaking of the bottles, I'm not sure covering the necks with tin foil will keep the freshness in, nor the rot out.. I'm sure it's hard to find a good corkshop these days, but still, at least put some preparation and care into what will someday be your legacy for slime's sake!

At Lori's parent's house, where she lives at age 22, we find her father is a hardass who isn't exactly fond of Alex's non-corporate starving-artist beatnik ways. Can you blame him though? Alex thinks that once you're in the machine, it's not about the statement anymore, it's just product. Hey, that may be true, but pretty soon you're going to find yourself digging through trashcans just like Roman if you keep that mindset. Lori, against her father’s wishes, expresses that she is going to move it with Alex. But not so fast, as Alex has other plans! Things are moving too fast, and with the way Alex's life seems to be deteriorating with the rampant drug use and seedy new friends, it's probably not a good idea that she moves in with him. Lori is distraught, while speaking to her mother. "I don't understand this, we made plans."

"Alex seems to have made other plans." Cut to Alex, face bandaged up while he walks an Asian prostitute into his apartment. Other plans indeed! I suppose being a hooker isn't all fun and bangs, especially when your 'Johns' have their faces and hands bandaged up, and there's green goo dripping from between the wrapping. She wants to know who she's doing though, so she begins to slowly remove the nasty sticky bandages from his head. "I'm only doing this until I graduate" she says as she turns on the light and shines it on him. All of a sudden Alex rises up, with straight razor in hand and slashes her face in anger! Ah, straight razors... the weapon of choice amongst all psychopaths on a meltdown.

"You crazy bastard!"

We reach the halfway mark of the film and this is where light is shed on all the weird and crazy junk that's been going on. Alex, now sporting some manly shades of grey in his hair (ala Reed Richards, and just as charismatic), is going through Nicole's stuff when she walks in. Nicole isn't really Nicole, well she was rather, until she killed herself under the orders of Zachary. Her, and Zachary's other minions who committed mass suicide, eventually took over the bodies of the new tenants who moved in. The only one left, ready and waiting to come back to life, is Zachary himself... and now that Alex has been corrupted by wine, goo and the (fully clothed) sex, his body is ready to be taken over! Alex naturally becomes rather pissed off and storms out, telling Nicole or whatever the hell her name is that this isn't his idea of a cool time baby. All the while, Lori has become increasingly worried to the point where she decides to lay down the mad cash and see Helga for some unfortunate advice. Alex is in the midst of "The watchdogs of evil!", and she sees "naked bodies, engaged in Unspeakable acts." Naked bodies, did I miss something?

Lori's not the only one who's worried about Alex. His denim wearing buddy Jerry with the frizzed up do confronts him on the streets. "I know that people don't just change overnight unless they're doing some serious shit!" Alex erupts at him and storms off while Jerry screams "It's those neighbors of yours isn't it?!" Back at the apartment, Lori uses her key to enter Alex's apartment. (Even though he didn't want her to move in later, he had given her a key before the transformation.) She opens his fridge and finds pulsating goo inside, much to her horror! Naturally she begins to snoop around, and in his closet finds a box of unmentionables... such as sunglasses, bandages, muck covered gloves, a straight razor and a woman's red high heel shoe.

"What... are you doing!?" Alex says in a rather upset tone as he confronts her, his anger out of control now, and his paranoia becoming increasingly dangerous. But all the while, he somehow remains calm and goes on to uncover all the horrid little details of what went on in the house. For some reason though, he doesn't seem to just get the hell out of there... even when an investigator comes poking his nose around. Why not just get up and leave? I think I may have an idea. He's laying there in bed, covered in slime, writhing around in his Speedo while in the next apartment over, Nicole (with a bit of the Vampirella look going on) treats us do a cute little striptease. Complete without the stripping aspect, there's nothing like an erotic dance to take a film to the next level. [The music in the scene is quite reminicent of Goblin's Schock soundtrack, which adds to the trippy feeling.]

After being introduced to the sexiest woman in the film (who is in the film for all of two seconds *grumble*), Alex starts to gel up again and freaks out. So he runs away to bandage himself up, and decides to take the back alleys to get back home. This brings us to one of the films gorier, and not to mention funnier moments, where Alex is confronted by a group of young, black street thugs. They demand him to fork over the dollars "Alright Mister Invisible Man...", and when he tells them to get a job, the knife comes out... and goes in. (WATCH THE CLIP, while you can.) He disposes of their leader with a stomach chomp to the forearm, and arterial spray coats everything. The rest of the thugs proceed to crap their pants, and get the shit out of there.

Don't forget the boombox!

Alex runs home and checks his face in the mirror once again, only to be surprised by his old buddy Jerry, who was let in by the landlady. Jerry is worried, like any 'concerned' friend would be. He tells alex to get help, but that's not on Alex's agenda... see, he likes the way he's become. And thus ends their friendship, as Jerry's time to go bye-bye finally comes. So long Jerry, you'll be sorely missed. The film has entered its point of no return. All out madness has ensued and it's only going to get crazier! The stuff nightmares, and Cult Classics are made of. Alex has embraced his future, that he will surely become Zachary and lose his soul.

In one of my favorite scenes, Lori stops by Alex's place. Nicole stands across the hall in her doorway and the two of them exchange looks. Subtle, but a brilliant scene I'd have to say. We're then cut to the after-effects of what I'm guessing was finally Lori's first sexual encounter in life. She lays shirtless under the covers, smiling, as she has just given herself to the man she loves. According to Alex, she just laid there and let him do all the work. Not bad for a first timer I guess, but he's used to take-charge women like Nicole, so consider him displeased. Lori turns over and notices his pillow drenched in goo, but doesn't make too big a deal out of it since well, what does she know about sex anyways? That can be a normal thing as far as she's concerned. Lori wanders around the apartment and checks out Zachery's book on possessing flesh, and after his shower, Alex returns and begins to massage her shoulders. Starting off slowly, he begins to put more pressure unto her neck.

"Alex, you're hurting me."

"No, I'm killing you."

Let the strangulation commence! Heh, I've always wanted to say that. They exchange a little fork-play and Alex, or make that Zachary, chases her around the room. "You turned me into what I am, you little cocktease!" In the finale, which features most all of the special effects and took five days to film, we come to find out that either this Zachary guy is pretty much a complete wuss, or as Lori thrashed him, there was still a bit of Alex left that held back and let himself be killed. In the end, Lori did what needed to be done to save Alex. Cut off his head, dismembered his limbs, stuck a knife through his temple.. and when his brain tried to crawl away, she hacked it to little pieces. After all, you know what they say: If you love them, set them free... with a meat cleaver.

So what is it that makes Slime City so bloody awesome? I don't know.. I guess it was just Born with it!

It was conceived in that fateful time peroid where it ties itself to films such as Street Trash and Brain Damage. Sort of a demented family trio, they're made all the better if viewed back to back to back. Lamberson was first assistant director on Brain Damage. James Muro (world famous steadycam operator, pot smoker, and director of Street Trash) worked the camera on this film. The special effects were done by those same crazy guys who did work for Street Trash and The Toxic Avenger. Lamberson regulars Mary Huner, in a double role as both Lori and Nicole, and that lovable scamp Robert Sabin go all out with their performances. Robert Tomaro, who did the work on the insane music for this, didn't go on to do anything further as far as I can tell.. which is strange, since the soundtrack here is very memorable. Memorable as well is the sickening gore and slime! Which of course is why anyone would probably grab this DVD off the shelves in the first place, say if they didn't know anything about it... the name of the film is SLIME CITY. Gross things are going to occur.

Some people, yes even horror fans, criticize the film for having a slow as a snail pace. Lamberson himself, for the 1999 VHS release even trimmed scenes to shorten the running time. Later he found that the cuts didn't all work in the film's favor however, and for the DVD release which is currently in print from Retro Shock-O-Rama Cinema, he incorporated a few of those cut scenes back in while leaving the rest out. So technically this could be called the third cut of the film, "or the Ultimate cut, that is until an HD release." Though I personally don't find the film to lag as much as people say, I think that some have mistaken pacing problems for its disentranced and aloof atmosphere. The film, even though over the top, plays it calm and somewhat dissasociative in nature. Much like, say, The Deadly Spawn. In both films there are many reasons for the "normal people" to freak out completely, or skip town, but everyone seems far too laid back for that sort of thing. So laid back that the viewer might become confused.

The DVD truely is of Collector's Edition standards, as the film is remastered from Original Vault Elements, has been properly letterboxed to 1:78:1, anamorphically enhanced, and looks great even if a few bits of dirt and scratches show up now and then. The Making Of Slime mini-documentary is a bit short, but with the inclusion of a six page foldout with liner notes by Lamberson, you'll get more great info. The commentary from Lamberson and Sabin is top drawer. And if that wasn't all, the DVD contains Lamberson's third feature film Naked Fear (1999) which also has a commentary track from the director and two stars Sabin and Tommy Sweeny.

I think if you're a fan of this film, or films of this type, then you already know what Slime City is. If you're not into this sort of genre, or don't understand it, then, if I were capable of pity, I would indeed pity you. If you're of the explorative type, I say not only give it a try, but own it as well. Greg Lamberson's films get better with each viewing, I have found. Being let in on a lot (not all) of the inside jokes discussed in the commentaries and such, make them all the more enjoyable when you revisit the films. The director and stars are, in a word, likable. Even if you're one who tends to dislike everything...

Slime City is highly Recommended.