November 28, 2013

How I dress my little goblin.

Is there a reason why all baby clothes completely suck ass? Seriously, have you guys even seen any of this shit!? "Don't make me call Grandma", "I'm cute like Mommy", and "I text and drive just like Mommy when she ran over Grandma." Fucked up shit, man. It's bad enough that adult clothes are 90% garbage, but this cringe-worthy bullshit is just embarrassing to look at. Are the people who come up with the designs on these things the same people who write the shit on those $1 birthday cards or what?

Something has got to change when it comes to all this cutesy shit. And since creating Evil Baby Clothes isn't something I plan on doing anytime in the near future, I figure that I'll just have to be a good parent and be selective with what I buy my little dude. My son is going to wear cool (ghoul) shit... and some nerd gear too, because that's what his dad would do. My face lit up when I first saw the full body skeleton suit, but leave it up to my ghoulish goo to go completely insane over the Pumpkin Butt pajamas.

He'll be drinking pumpkin beers by the age of fifteen... you just watch!

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My words are my own and as of posted from their creation forward I hereby claim originality to them. Pictures may prove to be promotional items and are the sole possessions of their respectful owners and/or companies. I do not sell, nor do I buy. I only rent, so therefore, nothing I own is truly mine.